Get Your Premium Membership

The Wealthy Old Man From Kansas

'There was a wealthy old man from Kansas Wasn't concerned if he caught the virus He was wealthy you could tell Owned ten rolls of cottonelle Said If I die "least I've got a clean A. S. S. ". Written 13th March 2020

Copyright © | Year Posted 2020




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 11/13/2020 5:32:00 PM
Tom, you crack me up with your COVID tale, and your funny rhymes for Kansas. The media made a big story out of a little story and it became a self-fulfilling prophecy. At least the hand sanitizer and TP are back on the shelves but the pandemic isn't going away anytime soon. ~ John
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/14/2020 3:46:00 AM
Thank you very much John, these vaccines are not a magic bullet by any means but the press make out its a game changer, there is no cast iron guarantee they will work either. Hopefully I'm wrong but we just have to take care and stay safe. Tom
Date: 4/7/2020 8:20:00 PM
Hahaha, love this funny limerick Tom. Laughter is the best medicine. Hugs
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 4/8/2020 4:08:00 AM
Thank you Cecilia, you're right, humour will help us through these dark days. Stay safe Tom
Date: 3/26/2020 1:24:00 PM
Hi Tom, I had to laugh at this limerick - good for you for giving us all what we need - escape! Blessings, Jennifer - be safe!
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/26/2020 8:05:00 PM
Thank you Jennifer, humour In these times doesn't go amiss, stay safe. Tom
Date: 3/19/2020 9:17:00 AM
Hahahaha! Important to exit 'cleansed of all -- ahem -- of all -- ahem... Guess I just can't find the words to express this sentiment. Thoroughly enjoyed this one, Tom! Thank you! ~ Gershon
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/19/2020 10:46:00 AM
Thanks Gershon, I'm glad you got a laugh put of it. Hope you're well. Stay safe. Tom
Date: 3/17/2020 6:25:00 PM
sad that people hoard things that other's need...many cannot find what they need .. good write Tom... always a joy to read your limericks... hugs
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/18/2020 2:14:00 AM
Even though there's tons of everything, media puts on pics of empty shelves at supermarkets, it's a red rag to a bull. Hope alls well. Tom
Date: 3/16/2020 10:35:00 PM
Funny a Fav for me
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/17/2020 5:07:00 AM
Thanks Timothy. Tom
Date: 3/16/2020 3:13:00 PM
- His A.S.S. like a newborn baby ... when the cotton rollers are used up, he can use paper money :) - Excellent, Tom :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/16/2020 3:18:00 PM
Thank you Anne, hope you're well. Tom
Date: 3/16/2020 2:53:00 PM
I'm chuckling
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/16/2020 3:08:00 PM
Thanks Kenneth, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Tom
Date: 3/16/2020 11:00:00 AM
Making the most of a worrying situation, Tom! Keep your humour flowing. ~ Regards // paul
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/16/2020 11:11:00 AM
Thanks Paul, it's all we can do. Stay safe. Tom
Date: 3/15/2020 6:55:00 PM
Hi Tom: excellent play on words!! (ha ha)
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/15/2020 7:15:00 PM
Thanks Ralph. Tom
Date: 3/15/2020 1:58:00 PM
hahaha. Excellent one!!
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/15/2020 4:42:00 PM
Thanks Andrea, I'm sure humour will get us through with whats coming, I'm hoping anyway. Stay safe Tom
Date: 3/15/2020 1:35:00 PM
You Sir truly knows how to lighten the mood , the world needs more people like you Tom, Quite a humorous piece. Nicely done lol!
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/15/2020 4:41:00 PM
Thanks Rercy, I think things will get worse before they get better. We can try and lift our spirits with a bit of humour. Hope you're well. Tom
Date: 3/15/2020 12:12:00 PM
Tom, The Wealthy Old Man From Kansas, love that title. Could it be that we share in the riches as long as we sustain our humor? "The overwhelming majority of Americans are possessed of two great qualities a sense of humor and a sense of proportion. -Franklin D. Roosevelt
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/15/2020 4:39:00 PM
Thanks Richard, love the quote, I'm hoping humour will see us through the dark days ahead. Hope you're well. Tom
Date: 3/15/2020 3:19:00 AM
Wonderful,y creative Tom. In this day of TP addiction. So hilarious....a FAV, my friend. Panagiota
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/15/2020 3:57:00 AM
Thank you Panagiota, happy you enjoyed it. Hope you're feeling better. Tom
Date: 3/14/2020 11:59:00 PM
lol.. Even the virus smiles..
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/15/2020 3:56:00 AM
Haha, thanks Jenish, Tom
Date: 3/14/2020 2:55:00 PM
ha! very funny, tom! glad the powers that be didn't bleep you out...
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/14/2020 2:57:00 PM
Thanks Ilene, I was careful lol. Stay safe. Tom
Date: 3/14/2020 6:31:00 AM
Hahahahahaha! You have surpassed yourself dear, Tom! We need humor, especially at this period! Thank you my friend for injecting optimism! God bless you!
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/14/2020 6:51:00 AM
Thank you Demetrios, we can't change things but we can try and lift people's spirits with humour Stay safe . Tom
Date: 3/14/2020 3:07:00 AM
Wow, Hot topic Tom, and you nail it to perfection...
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/14/2020 4:13:00 AM
Thanks Harry, toilet rolls more valuable than gold at the moment, Kleenex have won the lottery lol. Tom.
Date: 3/13/2020 11:30:00 PM
G'day Tom ... it appears some people must have a recipe for toilet paper. The panic! My gosh - thanks Tom - Lindsay
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/14/2020 4:10:00 AM
Thanks Lindsay, never mind food and medicines lol. What did they use 200 years ago Tom
Date: 3/13/2020 7:21:00 PM
Tom, like mentioned below, laughter is the best medicine. Good one. Hope you stay healthy ~ John
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/14/2020 4:06:00 AM
Thanks John, I'm with you, laughter wil get us through this. Tom
Date: 3/13/2020 7:09:00 PM
hahahaha, Tom, everyone is taking the lead of humor.
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/13/2020 7:12:00 PM
Thanks Eve, I think in these dark times humour is the best medicine. Stay safe. Tom
Date: 3/13/2020 6:58:00 PM
Ha! Tom you and I are thinking in the same vein re the toil tissue shortage. A great Lim! Glad you liked my lim re Charmin and Angel Soft. Hunker down and take care of yourself - Bob
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/13/2020 7:10:00 PM
Thanks Bob, well as the saying goes, great minds think alike lol. Tom
Date: 3/13/2020 6:30:00 PM
Haha! Your wonderful wit never fails to delight me, Tom. Though these are worrisome times, having a good laugh is good medicine for what ails us. Thanks for a healthy dose of humor, my friend. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 3/13/2020 7:39:00 PM
Yes, true. Stay safe, as well, my friend.
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/13/2020 6:37:00 PM
Thank you Susan, yes these are worrying times, quite a lot of events and gatherings cancelled in the UK. I still think the world should have acted sooner, we've had pandemics in the past, the Spanish flu killed over 50 million in 1918. Mankind never learns though. Stay safe. Tom
Date: 3/13/2020 6:19:00 PM
ha ha ha a funny virus poem I like it tom!:-) hugs jan xx
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/13/2020 6:22:00 PM
Thanks Jan, its our humour that will get us through these dark days. Tom
Date: 3/13/2020 5:42:00 PM
This is hilarious--laugh out loud kind. Owning ten rolls of cottonelle is definitely wealthy these days. Loved your humor, Tom.
Login to Reply
Cunningham Avatar
Tom Cunningham
Date: 3/13/2020 5:45:00 PM
Thanks Vijay, I was trying to rise above the doom and gloom that's everywhere at the moment. Worrying times though. Tom

Book: Reflection on the Important Things