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Shipwrecked Heart

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This is not for the contest. The prompt is below, so I wanted to write a poem about being in that exact moment, not having time to think, just to let it all out, as I faced death.... ( I didnt even check for grammar)..

The Titanic is filling up with seawater. The lifeboats are gone. You are trapped and you know the end is near. You have just enough time to write your last goodbyes, or to write whatever might inspire you in this moment. What is going through your head? Are the stars out? The moon? Do you hear the screams from the lifeboats and from those in the sea? Adrenalin is rushing through your blood. Your heart is beating out of your chest. At this moment, just before death, you have never felt more alive. All your senses are heightened. Now, what will be the last words you ever pen in this world?

I always hated water, being in the middle of nowhere, but it was the only way to be with you.. Now, I'm helpless, my fingers trembling, lips quivering, eyes full of tears, as this ship sinks, inch by inch. I write what are my last words, as the stench of fear, slowly fills the bitter air. I'm so scared. I can see lifeboats over loaded with the 'privileged', their aura in a state of shock, but so sullen. Not all children have escaped, not all children!!! How is that fair?? Some have jumped into the sea, desperate to survive, but its too cold.... It's freezing. I'm just going to accept there is no escape. I don't know if I'm a coward or being brave, but I refuse to go up to the deck. This room is now my tomb. The violinist won't stop playing, his music, so eerie, as we face our fate. The captain said; "Even God could not sink this ship." But you can't cheat God.. I see him crying in the corner, ready to decay into death - such a pathetic man. There are brief screams of "Help!" but then only a haunting silence. I think about my mum tell her, I love her and I'm so, so sorry, for I left her behind to follow my dreams, where I thought I would find heaven, but now seem bound into the unknown.. I had left the English shores, to be in your arms my sweetheart.. So many hopes, so many promises to be together... Forever, to touch and caress your soft skin and to place this gold ring on your finger, dreams of children, places we would see, food we would eat, poetry we would recite, starry nights and sweet sunsets, now slowly fade away... I can see your face, your almond eyes, your scarlet lips, your hand reaching out to me... An enchanting last mirage. I'm so sorry my love, so, so, sorry, to leave you this way, life can be so cruel, but remember me, please don't forget me, you were my only treasure I just wish I could have kissed you one more time... but God has deprived that from me... Please don't mourn for me, but cherish our memories, be happy and live your life, find love, have children and travel the world.. At least, I will not live in regret. I write my last words with my last breath, as I begin to feel numb, I will place my hands together and repent... This is my goodbye to the world.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Date: 1/16/2024 4:01:00 PM
So beautiful and sad SO. Visionary expertise, kelli
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Date: 1/16/2024 7:22:00 AM
Your write is so explicit about the terror and horror of waiting to drown and die. You tug at heartstrings as people remember the movie and think of the real sinking of the Titanic, quite horrific. You craftfully and creatively talk of your loved one who makes it and wish her a love filled happy life and your mother who I can tell you love so much and then you pray and prepare to say goodbye. A sad but very enjoyable poem my friend. Hugs and blessings Jennifer
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Date: 1/16/2024 5:49:00 AM
So powerful and moving! Beautiful composition.
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Date: 1/15/2024 10:45:00 PM
Spot on. Delightful and Majestic...
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Date: 1/15/2024 5:16:00 AM
A rush of emotions after reading this and I felt my eyes tear up.. I am speechless! Such a moving and majestic piece it was.. going in my FAVs.
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Date: 1/14/2024 7:23:00 PM
This is a powerful and emotional read, with so many true-to-life facts. Though it made me slightly emotional, it didnt quite bring on the tears, perhaps because of the last paragraph, where you have resigned yourself to your fate and accepted with grace the circumstances. Hugs
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Date: 1/14/2024 3:27:00 PM
This was very powerful and emotive. You have captured the final moments so well. I can see you on ship, writing...
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Date: 1/14/2024 1:15:00 PM
i enjoyed reading this one - you should've entered it! such a tragedy; it makes you think about the individual lives, the stories and last thoughts of those on board; thoughts, perhaps, just like this...
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Date: 1/14/2024 1:14:00 PM
The way you just let your feelings flow is probably what Tommy wanted. Wow. I see he even responded. Yep, your win is in the bag!
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Tom Woody
Date: 1/14/2024 2:06:00 PM
I knew from his notes he was not entering, which is why I felt free to comment
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Silent One
Date: 1/14/2024 1:59:00 PM
Thank you..it was not for contest though..
Date: 1/14/2024 1:09:00 PM
Beautifully sad. I think, really, your words agree with mine, but in a different way. "But God has deprived that of me," ie, blaming God for the situation at hand. I like that yours focuses on the being with her, that she is the last thing in his mind. The her he will never have. Awesome take on the theme
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Silent One
Date: 1/14/2024 2:00:00 PM
They were his words not mine, so he agreed with you...lol...Thanks Tom
Date: 1/14/2024 11:38:00 AM
I see you and I have struck a similar chord with our stories. I enjoyed reading yours.
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Date: 1/14/2024 11:21:00 AM
stench of fear, slowly fills the bitter air.. I left her behind to follow my dreams, Ooo heart trembling lines brotha.. damn that last line hits hard!!! I write my last words with my last breath, as I begin to feel numb,I will place my hands together and repent... beautifully written!! My goodness if I was on the titanic… I have no clue wat I will do … I will probably freeze aeee.. but then again.. like Elsa said “the cold never bothered me … so maybe I’ll blend in with the ice ..XD
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Date: 1/14/2024 11:05:00 AM
I can't imagine what those people went through as that ship sank. Those onboard and those having to watch as it went down and some knowing that their loved ones were going down with the ship. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us about the tragic event. I appreciate you dropping by my page and taking time to read and write a review. Sara K
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Date: 1/14/2024 7:52:00 AM
The poem revolves around the feelings of fear, regret, love, and longing for the person they are leaving behind dear SO. The word choice in the poem is emotional and evocative, conveying a sense of despair and resignation. The use of emotive language and sensory details enhances the emotional impact of the poem. Your use of simile" aura in a state of shock", personification"God has deprived that from me", and imagery"your almond eyes create a powerful and poignant atmosphere.
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Date: 1/14/2024 6:10:00 AM
Ah its one of those days having a migraine attack, but i got on here to read your poem, and now im in tears, i cant help it. Sigh. I cried when i watched titanic, now im crying after reading this too. So heart wrenching; your quick scribbles are the best as they really make us readers feel so much: i dont know why you would not enter this, the simplicity of your words and emotions im sure would make this a winning poem in the contest too: but then again, some judges can never tell, however some
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Tom Woody
Date: 1/14/2024 1:10:00 PM
Sorry unwell Inky
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Ink Empress
Date: 1/14/2024 6:14:00 AM
Poems so personal like this arent for another to judge. So i understand why you would not enter too, but i just love this, and you kno wat stood out for me besides the ending and the almond eyes of the beloved which the character expressed longing for, it is how you wrote “ Not all children have escaped, not all children!!! How is that fair?? Some have jumped into the sea, desperate to survive, but its too cold.... It's freezing.” Im literally crying! And i love what the captain said and the lines after and made me think of the movie and thats something I highlighted in my hazy way in my poem “ even the gold and silk couldnt save me” which means the ones that traveled in first class they too couldnt be saved, when God and fate decides its time to go, no money no status can change it: thats wat my last lines meant too and i thought of that again! This is a top fave for me
Date: 1/14/2024 5:59:00 AM
Powerful emotions aptly convey the final goodbye. --I write my last words with my last breath, as I begin to feel numb, I will place my hands together and repent--no doubt that is how they felt as the final moments brought to fore the inevitability. Perfectly emotive--on mark with the theme, SO.
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Date: 1/14/2024 4:16:00 AM
wow Silent One, you should enter it in the contest its very well written. I so love that movie, after the movie came out I went and purchase a butterfly comb like the one she lost and went to an evening gala wearing it, as for the coeur the la mer, I never did throw it away, but if I were dying, I'd bequeath it to the person I love the most, smile, I'm getting sentimental here, have a good day :)
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Silent One
Date: 1/14/2024 4:41:00 AM
Nothing wrong with getting sentimental, as that is what is beautiful about poetry, I got sentimental from Sara's Notebook poem today... I am not going to enter this for a contest, as it was more as an exercise for me, to feel empathy in a moment when we are close to death, which is not difficult for me, as I have been close several times.. Thank you
Date: 1/14/2024 3:13:00 AM
Oh goshhh, this is an immensely heartfelt and overwhelmingly sad write..What an intricately deep and soul stirring piece you've knitted, dear Silent One..Sigh, made me really emotional, because these words just directly pierce..I can resonate with the essence of death for I myself, was in a similar situation 6 years ago..sometimes, we don't realise enough about the scare of death and losing our loved ones, until it comes, standing in front of us..Every line here speaks for itself, how impeccably
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Silent One
Date: 1/14/2024 4:42:00 AM
I didnt realise this would be so popular.. Thank you for all your support and comments today.
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Hiya Sharma
Date: 1/14/2024 3:16:00 AM
You've described the scene of ship's sinking and those hailing about the 'unsinkable' quality of it, now succumbing to an evermore darkness and grief..poetically, this write just speaks of brilliant storytelling, conveying of imagery so effortlessly that makes the readers feel as if they are present in that moment too.. Wonderfully weaved, a FAV once again..
Date: 1/14/2024 2:59:00 AM
WOW! Double WOW. That is just amazing... you never fail to enchant, impress, risk your last words, your last thoughts. Brilliant as always. I love this. A fave. God bless you always, love, Gina
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Silent One
Date: 1/14/2024 4:43:00 AM
Thanks Gina, glad you liked this one..

Book: Shattered Sighs