Long Crasher Poems

My Halloween party was in full swing. I had gone all out this year and rented an old crumbling, reputed-to-be haunted mansion for the evening's Dionysian festivities, and all the invited guests were present and...

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The beauteous flowers and the hopeful trees bow to you.
The great beasts of the land inhale the clean, earthy smell of the rain you bring.
O Azure, bringer of the great flood and creator of oceans.
Your...

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Come one and all, IT'S HALLOWEEN
WHOOP!
I sent Freddy to invite you to a bash
I see he's told you of it, sight unseen. 
With a wicked dream and a bloody gash
You've been sliced to smithereens!
AHHH!
So stumble...

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Days that end on notes unwell
Compel this weeping soul
To walk among a secret garden

Where stepping stones in careful lay
And the rains of winged and flower friends
Give way to hearts unburdened

And to tears of joy 
Or...

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Did Discover That Trump Is Diabolic

We did discover Trump was diabolic;
Symbolic of problem that is Systolic;
Does need some stroll,
Through weight control;
Way above head becoming psychotic.

Jim Horn

Fear What We Hear from Trump

What we hear from Trump...

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That was my mistake you remind me ever.
You used me for a mistake you are clever.
You never thought I work hard for my desire,
You threatened me if I refuse you will open a fire.

Could you...

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Phantom Lovers
Rick Folker

Seek the meek
In bars discreet
Where men hold men
longing
to be 
complete

the disco days
the haze, the craze
before we ever dreamed
there could be a party crasher
like AIDS

dance, dance, dance
abandoned, unbound
that heady freedom
offering a chance

Your soul is...

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Ahhhhhh.... they make me so mad!
A fool, a buffoon, an unruly lad,
A prankster, a trickster, a tattler,
A gigolo, a lounger and an idler;

An imposter, a pretender and a loafer,
A party crasher, a tailgater and a...

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Ahhhh...they make me so mad:
A fool, a buffoon, an unruly lad,
A prankster, a trickster, a tattler,
A gigolo, a lounger and an idler;

An impostor, a pretender and a loafer,
A party crasher, a tailgater and a golfer,
A...

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I crashed my neighbor’s party today.
Though they wanted me to leave; I ate their food anyway.
When they tried to throw me out I called for the cops to hall them away.
The other party animals wanted...

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It seems everyone is bent on stinking up the house so here I go
Do you warn people ahead of time?
Can it be deadly?
Is it because you ate too many beans?
Can it come with loose stool?
Uggh...

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At the Dating Auction

Anne drew
Andrew

A Mere Lord

Baron
Aaron

Big City Guy

Boston
Austin

He Who Crashes Weddings

Crasher
Asher

Bird Boy’s Best Feature

Allan’s
Talons

Scam Man

Shady 
Brady

The Arrogant One

Snobby 
Bobby

Christmas Guy

Merry
Barry

Halloween Guy

Scary
Barry

The Proposal

Baxter
asked her

After Laying Out

Darker
Barker

Twinkle Toes

Sparkly
Barkley

The Water’s Fine

Wade in,
Brayden

Brave Heart

Lion
Bryan...

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