Rude Limerick Poems

Zelenskyy speaks with fortitude
A thing Vance and Trump find so rude
Now see what happens
With Europe’s factions
And how far mad Vlad will intrude...

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I once had a PE teacher from Lille,
who cruelly knew how to make me feel
like the sweaty, old rag
stuffed in her scuffed gym bag
to hide...

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I tried to ignore the buffoonery and the cartoonery of the last 3 weeks of "politics," but found it impossible to do when so much...

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I once loved a woman, a Tartar,
who turned out to be a real farter.
When I said it wasn’t polite
and to stop it! at least at...

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There once was a young man from Szechwan,
who thought his dick looked like a pecan.
He met a cutie named Butts,			
who was hankering for nuts,		
so he...

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My muse has been hiding out
And with no peep, squeak or shout
She must be sound asleep
No words, just counting sheep
Tired of the poetry drought

Oh where,...

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My muse has been hiding out
And with no peep, squeak or shout
She must be sound asleep
No words, just counting sheep
Tired of the poetry drought

Oh where,...

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My muse has been hiding out
And with no peep, squeak or shout
She must be sound asleep
No words, just counting sheep
Tired of the poetry drought

Oh where,...

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A young lady, quite fancy-free,
Was seeking romance by the sea.
She hoped some young man
Might have the same plan.
Que Sera, what will be will be.

The third...

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Act One: the stage and scenery are set
I was told the play, I'd not soon forget
But if truth were to be told
More like the game,...

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My favourite poet is ME
I’m obsessed with pooping and pee
So I’m a crap poet
Oh boy do I know it
My poem fans may disagree!
 
Some...

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Some people wind up with twisted knickers
When they get insulted by nitpickers
Words are sticks and stones
Causing moans and groans
When they hear heckling whispers and snickers

Women...

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Established in our acts of greeting.
Found and sounded in a meeting.
Manners present, kindness sown.
Etiquette of which is shown
Throughout a standing or seating.

Extending common courtesy
Is most...

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Some have said Jan has dung for brains
How rude are those who place disdains
on her poems in the soup
Their words are full of poop
Jan sits...

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Wake up, wake up, it's morning,
A brand new day is dawning.
Did you sleep well?
You look like Hell
Go back to bed, your yawning....

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