Religion Funny Poems

I strolled into Hell like a VIP/
Satan said, "what's this nonsense I see"/
"Bro, I out evil you", I smirked with glee/
Then he rage-quit chess, forfeiting...

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Gosh-o-Roonies, said the Moonies,
Drag you out into the boonies
Watch you be cut up by loonies
Feed you to the starving goonies....

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Now a story to finish this hour of news, 
Our reporter from out in the field,
Tom’s on the spot with the universe itself, 
Where the...

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You talk too much,
You worry and you fret.
You're angry about everything,
I wish that I were deaf.

You just talk, talk, talk, talk,
You talk too much.

You fuss,...

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The Ten Commandments

1. Don't pick your scabs.
2. Don't put anything in your ear except your elbow.
3. Pee before you go to bed.
4. Pick up your...

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It seems that religion is really picking up with theses young ladies

The fad today at Least in the United States is, Holy Jeans

Never in my...

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She left the tent in holy fervor,
Hell-bent to spread the Word.
The Spirit moved and made her quiver;
No act of faith was too absurd.

She knocked on...

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When When Then Yoga

When
Your downward dog is barking and
Your cat pose is meowing and
Your tree pose is swaying and
Your cow pose is mooing and
Your cobra...

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I broke one of God's Commandments when I stole an extension cord.
I was struck by a bolt of lightning because I angered The Lord.
God is...

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When Darwin revealed our connection
To apes via natural selection,
   Some gibbered, “You devil;
   How beastly to level
A charge that our creed...

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Are you ready?
Picture eighty-seven children, practicing for a Christmas show
in a sales barn that does not have heat or a sound system.

A skunk died somewhere...

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Come purchase assurance! Salvation sold here!
Our rose-colored glasses cure doubt, pride, and fear.
Believe without question and watch your faith grow.
(The price may be truth, but...

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I will turn back the pages of my life,
to when I was a little girl at school;
it was an old catholic school run by nuns,
gosh,...

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A serpent saved Eve from a drouth
Medusa just opened her mouth
But snakes in her hair
How did they get their?
The Devil don't know North from South?...

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Of all the critters men have cursed,
The hateful hairy tick is worst.
His charm conceals a crudest quest
To snag you in his noxious nest.

Beware his lure!...

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