Funeral Funny Poems

Now again, someone upstairs, 
and somewhere on a bus
headed somewhere in Louisiana 
where it is one a.m.

eyes mind thy business 
while pyramid in the sky...

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Cold death it is, descending from the sky,
That like a shroud, across the land doth lie.

And why need death be cold?
Let we this tale unfold.
Dire...

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Forgive me my dearest friend please,                   ...

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Throughout my life dad and I have done many things together
graduating from Crayola, fishing and wiffleball
to tune-ups, casinos and funerals.

After one particularly salty funeral:
Dad and...

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A quick pre-Halloween poem to capture a creepy funeral home scene. 
______
T’was the night before Halloween, the funeral home quiet.
All the tables were taken, like...

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Look out you might see them
scuttling down your street
patting the neighbour’s dog 
nodding to people they meet

They lurk on hospital corridors
wearing their black shiny shoes
then...

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Satirical Journal Entry #1
Attempting Suicide:
Just The Beginning!
If I killed myself today would anyone notice? Would anyone be at my 
funeral?
If so, would they come just...

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To whom it may concern,
For time will surely tell,
I write to my loved ones
To say that I am well.

I scarcely can recall
A time more I...

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Here lies little Bill –
He took such a bad spill…
It happened at his still,
Making liquor was his thrill

Here lies gentle Jim –
His heart was never...

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In prepping for a funeral 
The family gathered in the hall
They sat there all mourning
Even though it was nightfall

He had eaten lots of vegetables
Yet, he...

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(after the novel)

I don’t care about fashion
I just try to keep warm
I’ve heard all about passion
Sounds like a great big storm
I stay out of the...

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 "she carved her own road . . . "

               ...

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I think all poets
know the refrain: 
“May he rest in peace...”

The blessed phrase,
Known to every card
writer; to every jingle
reciter – even Clay, the
Fighter, quite The...

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Written by Gail DeBole
On December 8, 2021
Updated on February 6, 2025

Before his fans entered the funeral’s door
They all read a sign that they couldn’t ignore.

The...

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He was always known to everyone as Uncle Albert,
He used to sign all my birthday cards as Uncle Albert,
He used to turn around when I...

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