Satirical Journal Entry 1 Attempting Suicide: Just The Beginning

Satirical Journal Entry #1 Attempting Suicide: Just The Beginning! If I killed myself today would anyone notice? Would anyone be at my funeral? If so, would they come just ot give themselves peace(piece) of mind over all the things they took from me? I guess better late than never! Hmmm.......... A corpse could always use a loan or a shoulder to cry on. I wonder how I would be dressed? Ah....... maybe somehow right before I die I could mangle my face so my casket would stay closed. -Less opportunity for more disappointment that way. If I killed myself today all chaos in my mind would end. I would be in hell for sure but I know that all this torture on earth would be forgotten. Yet one question still remains. Is it worth the damnation? Yes! I am a selfish !