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The Cold Embrace of Death

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For Sara Jama's Cold Embrace of Death contest.

Inspired by the painting "Faces" by Pavel Filonov dissect me into patterns tear out veins and rearrange explore me in full colour I'm a map of new terrain please, expose my innards don't forget my eyes teach me to speak beyond death to swerve off course break free from lines introduce insects beneath my skin track the path they choose mark down their exploration in avid pursuit of truth whisper in my ear of beauty stroke my skin as you unveil so dedicated to knowing not even death's cold embrace could derail let me stain glass to create interest beyond the bore of my own mind unhook my jaw if I'm too much my opinions - always ill-defined take exactly what you wish for oh, how I trust in what you preach though I know I'm one of many I feel undivided attention is in reach though no longer fascinating let's frame my past hype to keep I wouldn't want to have wasted myself on just any smooth-talking creep let every intersection act like a refrain body blood excess energy are all singing, despite pain I'm confident I'll regroup stride off with my head held high I didn't give too much of myself - definitely held back this time

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Duke Beaufort

Date: 4/19/2025 10:18:00 AM

Di11y, you have to be a very creative person to come up with something like this. I'm thinking about all the experiences you must have had in life and am reading the comments you've made to others. You have a very unusual and striking style that just makes me smile. Thanks for being here and amusing us with your talent!

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/19/2025 2:06:00 PM

I'm pretty standard issue Duke - married with children, university education. Definitely alternative rather than mainstream. Thank you for the encouragement to remain different :)

Lin Lane

Date: 4/18/2025 10:08:00 AM

Congratulations on your top winning placement, Dilly. You give more of yourself in your poetry than you know. Hugs, friend.

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/19/2025 8:16:00 AM

Thank you Lin, the tangent was initially started as I was trying to avoid anything morbid. I'm not sure that was necessarily the end product. Hopefully this isn't the poem that would reveal the real me lol

Susan Ashley

Date: 4/18/2025 8:30:00 AM

Dear DD, exquisite dark ink flowed through your verses with rich sensory imagery and intriguing metaphors to create a potent piece of poetic wonder. A complete captivation for my imagination! Ingenious take on the theme and use of language! Congratulations for your well-deserved trophy win in Sara's contest. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/19/2025 8:12:00 AM

Once I imagine myself writing something unoriginal, my brain gets creative and throws curve balls. Knowing Sara is more inclined to dark poetry then ramps that up a bit further to go out of my comfort zone. I was pleased that this snaked into this unexpected poem and absolutely delighted to do well in the contest..thank you for your kind and encouraging words, much valued x

Sara Jama

Date: 4/16/2025 6:00:00 AM

Congratulations in placing in my contest. I thoroughly enjoyed your deeply dark imagery in your writing. "dissect me into patterns tear out veins," is an absolutely brillant first line. "introduce insects beneath my skin track the path they choose mark down their exploration in avid pursuit of truth," is my favourite stanza. It reminds me of a movie called Bug. Just fantastic.

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/16/2025 7:21:00 AM

Thank you so much Sara. It's a real honour to receive your trophy, particularly as your winners list is incredibly strong. Thank you so much for the interesting prompt and encouraging feedback. It was a little different to let my mind go quite this dark but great to know it fit the prompt and interesting to explore such dark imagery. Thank you again :)

Mike Bayles

Date: 4/15/2025 10:08:00 AM

Very powerful, throughout the poem. One of my favorite parts is, "break free from lines."

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/15/2025 1:35:00 PM

I really tried to embrace the excess of emotion whilst simultaneously keeping it contained within this one - emerging different on the other side was key, so you picked out an important aspect. Thank you for stopping by with your words of encouragement :)

Terry Miller

Date: 4/15/2025 9:05:00 AM

Just WOW, congratulations on your Trophy Win!

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/15/2025 1:33:00 PM

I do love a 'wow' Terry :) thank you so much for taking the time to stop by with your encouraging words, appreciated :)

Suzette Richards

Date: 4/15/2025 4:06:00 AM

Wow! And I will leave it at that, because to deconstruct it, I would get lost in this wonderful imagery. Congratulations on your trophy win, DD. FAVing it :)

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/15/2025 1:32:00 PM

Ahh Su! What a fabulous comment :) this one was a thrill to write as it felt so different (although I've done a butchery and surgery one previously haha but quite rare to land on such imagery). I shall cherish my fave and your wonderful words, thank you :)

Mystic Rose Rose

Date: 4/15/2025 3:19:00 AM

wow there are no words to describe the feeling one gets one reading this Dilly Dally, when you write about death, you pull out all the punches and don't dilly dally, pun intended. Congrats on your 1st place, well deserved my dear ! you went for the stars and punched the darkness out of them, Love

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/15/2025 1:30:00 PM

What a beautiful comment! Thank you Rose :) paintings seem to tap into something when I view them and open doors. I few dozens and dozens before I start writing though! I appreciate you stopping by with such high praise, thank you once again :)

Robert James Liguori

Date: 4/14/2025 4:02:00 PM

Congratulations on your win!!!

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/14/2025 11:00:00 PM

Ahh I counted them, 3 exclamation marks :) Thank you Robert for your kind support, appreciated :)

David Kavanagh

Date: 4/14/2025 1:45:00 PM

Congratulations Dilly on your new trophy in Sara’s contest, and well deserved too, as you know I commented on the unfiltered free verse version of this piece, and honestly believe it would have equally shared top spot, both poems tore apart the fabric of surreality, and built a much more intelligible Frankenstein in the process, cheers David

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/14/2025 2:27:00 PM

I wouldn't be able to articulate a verbal reply as I'm too busy smiling haha. What a great comment! Thank you :) we really do need comment awards too :)

Ink Empress

Date: 4/14/2025 9:41:00 AM

Dear DD, Congratulations on your trophy win! Wow i didnt see that coming but surely well deserved!!! Nailed it

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/14/2025 10:09:00 AM

I'm delighted Ink! :) it's such fun having the contests that Sara sponsors as I know I can dial down my filters and let poems go in whatever direction they like. The prompts offer so much interesting scope :)

Lin Lane

Date: 4/13/2025 5:41:00 AM

You gave a lot just stopping short of actually exposing your innards. Pavel's painting of many faces really was a source of inspiration for in it I see your veins, bleeding yet fighting off the cold embrace of death.

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/13/2025 6:22:00 AM

Haha Lin, I made myself recoil a bit with lines like 'innards' but once I was on a roll with it it was interesting to explore such different content. I like to try for a different angles lol hopefully it'll be well aligned for the contest but if not it was quite an interesting one to pen. Thank you for stopping by, appreciated :)

Ink Empress

Date: 4/13/2025 12:55:00 AM

Dear DD This is such a moving poem, so well written and expressed using such brilliant diction! I love the flow of your lines and your metaphors and how youv ended too but more than that your opening really stood out! And the artwork that inspired this piece is so deep and thought provoking! “ unhook my jaw if I'm too much my opinions - always ill-defined ” sometimes i tend to feel this way too especially when i feel unheard, “ though no longer fascinating let's frame my past hype to keep” so evocative and moving! I think youv categorized it as rhyme tho it should be ekphrasis? Did i spell that right? Best wishes in the contest! Sending you light always

Di11y Da11y
Date: 4/13/2025 6:15:00 AM

Thank you so much Ink :) I probably should put ekphrasis but the picture isn't visible during judging. I might add the reference on the poem. It's great having a contest that encourages these kind of step out of the usual comfort zone pieces :) it was fun to just pull images from the painting and see how it translated. Thanks for your encouragement, appreciated :)