Anything Goes -- 2020 Election Version

(Updated in such form that Cole Porter would sue) [Intro] Times have changed And we've often rewound the clock Since Nixon got the shock When he crashed on Daley’s bloc If today Any shock they should try to stem 'Stead of crashing on Daley’s bloc Daley’s bloc would crash on them [Verse 1] In olden days the missing ballots Would wind up on warehouse pallets Now, heaven knows Anything goes When today a quite delusional POTUS Will lean on a friendly SCOTUS Well, there she blows Anything goes A race decided by the voters Is now with the hoax promoters Who run the show So anything goes [Bridge 1] If voting twice you like If some vice you like If “aw shucks” you like If big bucks you like If Ted Cruz you like If fake news you like Why, it’s totally apropos . . . [Verse 2] When you turn away from common mores To buy into wacky stories Well, I suppose Anything goes When ev'ry month the PAC that's smart is Supporting the Grand Old Party’s Picks, goes to show Anything goes If you need a signature in Georgia Just tell ‘em and they will forge ya’ One like the pros Anything goes [Bridge 2] If boxes stuffed you like If counting muffed you like If ballot mules you like If network fools you like If Chinese hacks you like If Super PACs you like Why, wait for another blow . . . [Verse 3] When faced with waves of sham electors Confronted by fraud detectors Why, then you know Anything goes If voter fraud should fry your fanny And tallies sound Pakistani Then, heaven knows Anything goes Those mail-in votes sure look suspicious They may end up injudicious And so it goes Anything goes [Bridge 3] Just think of those shocks you've got And those knocks you've got And those blues you've got From the news you've got And those pains you've got (If any brains you've got) Left after the Tucker Show [Verse 4] Campaigners, too, who once knew better words Now only use four-letter words Scandal grows Anything goes Look out for guys who sound too brainy And broads with the name of Cheney Or heaven knows Anything goes [Bridge 4] The world’s gone mad today And good's bad today And black's white today And day's night today And that gent today You gave a cent today Will soon be serving 10 or so [Verse 5] So cast your vote and do your duty Remember you’ve still got Rudy Just goes to show Anything goes © 2023 by Ralph Protsik. All rights reserved.