A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.
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I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
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There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
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Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
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Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some smaller countries are neutral.
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Every speaker has a mouth; An arrangement rather neat. Sometimes it's filled with wisdom. Sometimes it's filled with feet.
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Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.
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To err is human--and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
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Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.
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Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.
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Never raise your hand to your children it leaves your midsection unprotected.
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Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
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Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.
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Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.
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Old people shouldn't eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get.
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Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down.
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There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers.
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Never raise your hand to your children; it leaves your midsection unprotected.
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If you can laugh together, you can work together.
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