Zoo-Nado

[Sometimes when I’m struggling to write I scrawl gibberish in the hope that inspiration will lie within. Sometimes, just sometimes… I like the result. This is one such] There’s an ostrich in my porridge There’s a shrew in my canoe There’s a tiger in my trifle There’s a Shih Tzu in my shoe There’s a spider in my cider There’s a goldfish in my loo There’s an aardvark in the car park and a coypu in my stew There’s a monkey looking funky With a meerkat for a hat And an adder up a ladder Hiding from a hungry rat There’s a beaver with a cleaver For he hasn’t any teeth And a gator ate a waiter Which was really rather brief There’s a haddock in my paddock And he’s in a proper muddle An explosion in the ocean Left him splashing in a puddle A polar bear just over there Has seen an easy lunch For haddock are so juicy With not many bones to crunch He gave up eating penguins When a penguin bit his neck He won’t see that electric fence For Polar bears don’t check And when he got a zap He got an aura that was fiery He staggered round in circles With his hair all black and wiry He tried to brush the soot off But he’d have to wash it later He didn’t get the chance Because he met the alligator The gator had to rest because Although he felt quite chuffed A waiter and a polar bear Had left his belly stuffed But my wife grabbed a hammer And she’s had ten thousand views Of her alligator handbag And her alligator shoes [Well, you were warned!]