You Are Not Meditating

You are not meditating You’re not reading the classics. not practicing barre cords on the guitar, not brushing up on your French. You’re just hanging on, for dear life by your fingernails. You’re trying. Trying not to eat too much chocolate, not to snap at your kids, not to drink too much, not to cry when you think of what you’re missing, or whom. You are doing the best you can. You shower. You work. You cook, you eat. You sleep, badly, and get up in the morning and do it all over again. Sometimes, you walk outside and are astonished that it is spring. Sometimes, you breathe a little deeper and imagine a life after this ends. Sometimes you stop beating yourself up for not doing quarantine the right way. Published in Thought for Food, 2020