Secrete Ingredient

Written Nov. 10, 2012 Gail’s Note: Not for the Faint of Heart Rated PG-13 (Poetic Grossness – 13 out of 20) What part of this is true? Answer posted at the end. I was at the hospital. It was a quarter past two. I was waiting for my husband. There was nothing to do. The emergency was over. His gall bladder was out. He was coming back home Better off, no doubt. The next day our daughter cooked A special meal for her dad. To celebrate the ending of what could have been sad. Instead we were all at the table Treating my hubby like a star When he eyed the counter And asked, “Where is the jar?” My daughter’s eye caught mine And she instantly knew That this was no ordinary Meat and Potato stew. She ran into the bathroom Her face turning green As she quickly zoomed Bypassing her scream. And while she was retching I quickly followed behind And while she was queching I spoke to ease her mind. “Your meal is bladder free. The jar’s on the garage shelf. Come, look with me. You can see for yourself.” And when she saw the jar Her eyes met mine. I could tell she was beginning To feel just fine. She went back to the kitchen And I did some retching myself Because I had just fibbed About that jar on the shelf. The bladder in that jar Was an old one of mine And dad’s had been cooked With potatoes, carrots, and wine. So the moral of this tale Is to say, “Thanks, but I’ll pass,” When given a memento of yourself From the hospital staff. Answer: Person who had the gall bladder removed was my cousin. The hospital really gave him his gall bladder to take home in a jar. He really set it on the kitchen counter. (Ugh!) His wife made him move it to the garage.