Paid In Full
I’ve mucked around when drinking beer like many other blokes,
who love to be involved when playing silly nonsense jokes.
It’s great to see a ‘bunny’ puzzled and completely unaware
that pranksters are around him, but he doesn’t know they’re there.
Of course there had to come a time when I let something slip,
by mentioning my problem when I should have bit me lip.
I guess it was the heavy beer that loosened up me tongue,
so admittance of a sexual problem put me well into the dung.
It was at a Sunday bar-be-cue with all me mates around.
I noticed my name on a package and lying on the ground;
the curiosity was too much, and there’s laughter from the dills,
when I opened up the pack and found, five Viagra pills.
So with the ribbing that I got I had to take it on the chin,
but I don’t mind, it’s all in fun, but when I sought a bin.
The culprit who had set me up let out an anxious screech
“Don’t throw the buggers in the bin, they cost me ten bucks each!”
I placed the pills out in the bathroom with the medicines and such,
for future reference when the prank has died and never mentioned much.
I’m sure I could hand someone a burger and see it scoffed unchecked.
They won’t know they’ve had Viagra but will suffer the affect.
But the pills were long forgotten on the bathroom cabinet shelf,
until old Grandpa made a visit and went searching by himself
in the bathroom for an aspirin to ease my Grandma’s pain,
where he found the five Viagra pills, so they surfaced once again.
With a cheeky declaration Grandpa asked me how they work.
I sort of stumbled with me words, trying desperately to shirk,
Any indication of experience, and so with nothing I can teach,
I did remind old Grandpa that they cost ten dollars each.
Then looking over Grandpa’s body there’s a sense that he is frail,
and with Viagra tablets being strong, his heart might not prevail,
but insistence by old Grandpa left me now without a choice;
he demanded a Viagra in a strong assertive voice.
Then Grandpa added “Don’t you worry ‘bout your money Son,
I’ll leave your ten bucks in the shed; I just hope I have some fun”.
And sure enough true to his word when I walked into the shed,
I could see the money on the bench, but he misheard what I said.
Because it wasn’t ten bucks lying there; it was one hundred bucks plus ten,
so I took Grandpa to one side and then repeated once again,
“Grandpa” I said “It’s only ten bucks; you’ve overpaid me you galah!”
“That’s all I gave you” Grandpa grinned - “The hundred’s from your grandma”.
Copyright © Lindsay Laurie | Year Posted 2021
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