One More Wound

To quote the queen of my broken heart “Call me a coward, too scared to leave” leave my cocoon; evolve, maybe I never will the air in here is suffocating suffocating but this is home To rewrite her words, I don't say scared can't say scared, frustration seems more appropriate I'm frustrated with life I can't seem to stop my fingers from complaining blaming society for this failed process constantly forcing me to step outside my comfort zone forcing me to put on a show demand to show you my worth only for you to pass me over the last picked for the team I thought we left this childish rhetoric behind How is anyone supposed to get ahead if this appears to be a popularity contest How can one succeed if the opportunity isn't even granted Here, another Thursday has come yet to pass, give it a minute, it'll fly by and I'm so tempted to sit back finally let out a cry Maybe belt out a scream for my frustrations not yet released toss a penny in the air for my thoughts but it'll come down a nickel for my wounds only for me to chuck it into the nearest body of water, a dime for my sanity though what I truly need is a quarter for my soul to remain apart of me safe and sound so I don't grow listless, selling my soul to the god of good fortune My memory grows hazy even though I studied Latin in my high school days I remember not who that is so I'd rather not test my luck my patience has already deteriorated a downward spiral of perpetual disappointments I've tried to rectify myself provide hope in dark corners pick myself out of this fog with distractions of pure innocence hoping happy faces and joyful encounters produce a pick-me up proving my spirits lifted And they are...until I proceed to try to manually change my own luck producing only another failure in its wake another failure for my legacy Success is built upon the corpse of multiple failures, so the motto now created goes A little morbid but the sentiment rings true Success is born from failures but failing multiple times at the same objective breathes insanity and I'm so darn tired of being crazy I've been trying to succeed at the same things for too many years and it never gets easier only more difficult as I keep trying and trying Do or do not, there is no try the counter argument to this little piece but I have no more words of complaint left to exude except these last few lines God, please help find a place for me I'm tired of being helpless tired of being a failure Mother Aphrodite, please point me in the right direction I'm so tired of being aimless so tired of wandering Where on earth is there left for me to feel whole What more can I do where my first reaction to action after a single setback of a new trial is: “This will only be disastrous if I continue” Someone once said that evil only breathe misery and the queen of my broken heart sings with the queen of my broken mind keeping my soul intact with it's keeper to stay down but through so much protest I constantly stand though I feel so empty on the inside I've asked once, yet received no answer Dear Brother, where are you when I need you most How much more must I suffer this and don't tell me it's when my heart explodes