Nobody Knows

No Body knows all the pain and suffering that I deal with every day.  Since you left without letting me at lease say goodbye to you. I know that I am a failure at life.  Every day waking up praying for someone to show up and claim me as part of their family.    Since you left me all alone with no family to show me love or affection. I keep trying to honestly latch on to other people’s families.  Knowing there’s no future in that because eventually they leave too. So I keep wondering how I have no meaning in this life.  Why does the world not see the painful tears that fall from my eye every night?    Is there no way out of the darkness that surrounds me? I would have followed you anywhere in this world.  All you had to do is say three words to me.  Instead you made me feel worse because you said I was ungrateful.  Which was never true.  All I ever wanted was love and understanding.    Instead all this world ever gave in return was nothing but pain and suffering.  Always feeling like a failure.  Putting on a fake smile to hide all the hurt feelings that are deep down inside.  While never showing the world how empty life is without ever having a family.    Always being confused what real love is supposed to feel like. While watching other people be happy and having the capability to show love.  Wondering why did God not give a loving family to me?  What did I ever do not to deserve to be shown some kind of kindness at lease?    Besides be brought into a world that will never understand how much pain is in my heart and soul.  Praying for the missing parts of my broken life to be found and finally put to rest.  Ending the empty tortured life that was called mine.