Jenny and Lenny Hook Up

Lenny was 30 and still living with his old cheese, everyone called, Lenny’s mum. She was always on his Cadbury Snack to go find a trouble and strife for a chum. “Geez, leave off mum, I’ve been looking down at the Punchbowl rubbity Dub”. “Well Lenny, go to the grab a granny at the Rissole, Fridý night will ya luv”. Friday came, Lenny put on his best bag of fruit and fired up his old VS Dunny Door. With his pay in his sky rocket as he hit the frog and toad with the peddle to the floor. Mum put some of dad’s old brill cream in his Fred Astaire before he left the house. “Be good Lenny, me little china plate, if ya need a lift home give me a Wally Grout”. Jenny was on the rock ‘n’ roll so she saved up her oxford scholars for a big night out. She wasn’t flash to look at, with her bifocal monkey’s arses but she had a good jam tart. She walked into the Rissole, tilting her leg as she let rip a decent Royce Hart. Her dad would’ve said, “A bit more choke and it would’ve made you start”. Jenny met Lenny at the near ‘n far, knowing he was giving her the old Captain Cook. Introductions made and Lenny thought she was a bit of alright, as he had a second look. They hit it off after Jenny’s Third vodka and Lenny’s fifth schooner of pigs ear. Feasting on bar snacks of party dogs eyes, Jenny dripping the dead horse in Lenny’s beer. A couple of young blokes walk up to Jenny and tried to give her Reg Grundies a flick. Jenny started throwing cut lunches, smashing him on the Lionel Rose, then gave him a kick. Lenny intervened, saying, “We don’t want any froth and bubble.” Before thing got nasty. He took Jenny outside screaming, “He’s got a face like a half eaten pasty”. And that’s how Lenny and Jenny met, Lenny’s mum was happy seeing Lenny with stars in his mud pies. They got cash ‘n carried, had a couple of billy lids, that loved to eat burgers and fries. It’s not at all romantic, but that’s how most Aussie love stories go. Lenny and Jenny together forever, They’re mates most of us will know.