Get Your Premium Membership

In the Chill of An Open Door

Cleaning out my refrigerator, an ice cube slides to the floor startling the cat, and interrupting a locomotive of thought that often tracks me down in a beam of light--- Today it streams through a window, where everything seems marred, by doubt, and dust, crusts of ice and sticky jello spilled on a glassy shelf. Oh, not the first time, this revelation of light, I've had it before while kneeling on the floor as I do now, and many times that I've knelt on a floor, to clean up my messes,... praying for help, praying for light, praying for forgiveness... and now on the floor to sponge up melting ice, water and tears Raising a young family...a life so demanding... Caring and nursing...two sides of the coin... My father and children....my husband caught between... It wasn't the impossible...but was never enough... The time took a toll....why did it seem cold....as cold as the ice? Could I have held out?.... Could I have been stronger?... A little while longer.... I shiver with memory,... or is it guilt, and regret? Regret, perhaps shame? Is it only the chill of the open fridge door? Or is it more?... So much more? Hmm, interesting metaphor, "a open door".......... did I leave it open long enough,... wide enough? Did I do all I could? All I should ? Was I patient enough? Was I all I could be? Was I tough enough to watch someone linger, lingering on, I ponder it now... Difficult years......but a fraction of life, is how it appears,.... Now looking back.... black fades to gray.. but it comes back in spades, to haunt me today A little while longer..... I could have been stronger.... _________________________________________________________

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 3/1/2013 1:28:00 PM
I love this, nicely done. I have a lot of thought like this at times ;} going to fav's !!!
Login to Reply
Date: 3/1/2013 8:21:00 AM
Impressive poem!! May your pen keep rolling!!
Login to Reply
Date: 2/19/2013 3:59:00 PM
Carrie, love your poem, a could have thought... love your winning poem~ LINDA
Login to Reply
Date: 2/19/2013 8:33:00 AM
Enjoy another top placement recognizing your work. RAY
Login to Reply
Date: 2/19/2013 7:12:00 AM
Congrats on your 1st place win. Well deserve Carrie. Warm Smiles, Connie
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 8:09:00 PM
wow! Carrie!! congrats on well deserved top placement!!!!!~sashi
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 6:31:00 PM
WOW! Carrie, this is an exceptional write! So emotive. Congrats on your well deserved 1st place win! Going in my favs. Love, Kim
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 5:27:00 PM
thats phenomenol, what a heart-wrenching write, congrats on the win
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 4:42:00 PM
awesome write...congrats
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 4:25:00 PM
I didn't know this was for a contest, congratulations on a well deserved win.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 4:23:00 PM
Straight to my favorities! This is a stunning piece of writing, it grabbed and held me and left me wanting more. What more can a person ask for? a piece of art.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 3:38:00 PM
Thisn is an exceptional poem, Carrie..it touches my heart.. dug up my own regrets...So well deserving of Ist Place! Wonderfully written! Love, Annalise
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 3:18:00 PM
So sad..whether a husband or a child still sad! Congrad's on your win. Light & Love
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 1:33:00 PM
- A worthy poem that deserved its first place in the contest, hooray for you Carrie .... congratulations!! - Have a nice new week, it's yours! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 6:53:00 AM
You misted my eyes with your profound poetry.When it comes to.those we love most we always feel we owe them more dont we..This beauty goes tmfv
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2013 1:51:00 AM
Carrie congratulations for an outstanding write, it is a very well deserved win, very moving and I love the rhyme scheme...David
Login to Reply
Date: 2/17/2013 7:28:00 PM
I hope you know you are not alone in your questioning yourself...pain and troubles become lighter when you know they are shared by many...blessings..
Login to Reply
Date: 2/16/2013 9:14:00 AM
This one touches. Those who do the most are often their own harshest critics. I always thought I did too little for my Dad but we had our times before he passed.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/16/2013 5:43:00 AM
Carrie, this poem is raw with emotion, the questions you dwell on, I have also asked and felt over and over, yes, I could have been stronger, but I did my best and I am sure you did also, best of luck in the contest with this incredible poetry, constance
Login to Reply