Feeling Empty

When we first split up, he still remained my continuous connection to my heart which made me not stop running back to our past when we met and fell in love. I am not ready for tomorrow to come,as i didn't know how to be in this world without him. I have to stop judging myself and him by those unreal standards in which i made myself ill. A sad beginning for me is to come to an intellectual understanding, that i was timid around him because my father was a remote and distant figure who never gave me any support and love needed to tolerate myself in those variety of afflictions in me, like,complaint,ailment, and misery. I will need imagination in dealing with these problems,like, creativity,vision,inspirations, fascination and passion. That will be a start to my way out of the problems of shame, which has been created by me long ago, before we met. Those were the reasons why my dreams of remaining in love, were actually being blown away by the wind at that split second. A door was ajar at the end of my passage when a face seemed to stare at me from the mirror, as i got closer it withdrew into darkness. So was my love. Terry.