Agony Aunt

Dear depressed girlfriend Thank you for your note He's obviously the boyfriend of the year So he's going to get my vote . Your boyfriend is in prison After he robbed the local shopping mall but he'd love you to visit San Quentin and do a strip dance on top of the wall . His sister is only jealous because she's been so long on the game Ten cents a trick Tess from Tulsa I'm sure you've heard the name . He's got a mate named Oliver He knows the artful dodger too and I'm sure the honourable Mr Fagin Would look after your kids for you . I know mister Cowell's sister Has been sending you advice but I know she has played twister with your boyfriend once or twice . So listen to your agony uncle To your boyfriend please be true When he gets out in ten years time He'll be coming back to you.