A Troubled Soul

A Troubled Soul They use these three words for countless endeavors, a face with no soul and a body with no mind Impaled by my inside thoughts, my heart and mind dueling each other for control, a civil war My heart yearns for the smile of my past while the mind shoves me towards a future devoid of a soul My future smile disgusts me; a place filled with the stout stench of dying souls and haunted cries I yearn for peace within me; I yearn to soothe the cries of my weeping heart I search for an escape; I yearn solitude, a place where the actions that stem from my thoughts offer no consequence They call it the greater good, yet the good from such actions is hard to decipher As I sacrifice my virtues to settle with someone beneath me, to avoid mewling over a lost love I tell myself if you keep me distracted then my thoughts are diverted from her I convince myself to fight on, yet the warrior within me has long been laid to rest Heaven has shunned my romantic soul, cupid`s aim is a distant memory of what it once was As my heart drowns in a love that betrays me, a cruel sick twisted gut-wrenching deceitful love, a false love Stuck in limbo my essence remains fragmented and my dreams still remain tormented Left behind to pick up the pieces of a shattered heart, left behind to reminisce the past Dead inside my dreams are in black and white; my dreams are to leave this world behind My lungs choked as they struggle to breathe the breath of life Like a fishing line my soul has been reeled in and cast out into the open repeatedly And like a game of football, my love has been kicked around far too many times Left to meander aimlessly like the soulless creature of darkness that I am Left to ponder on the inevitability of a demise yet to be told, yet to be unfolded I am stuck and my emotions betray my secrets to the wind, betraying my cause of life No love within the depths of my heart, no compassion to embrace the cold wilderness within me I walk the path alone and see what you`ve become without me, I sink further towards the gallows You *****, at least now I`ll see you in the misery and the hate of what you`ve become