A Lost Soul

~ To My Brother~ When I live in the darkness for days and nights I don't envisage to write a poem,but here I am crying over the loss of my brother who died on Easter Sunday, I stopped allowing my roses to come and sit by my side, I left them those dozens of exotic colors to die, I don't throw them away my living room with the china vase looks dead,even the colors have faded away,I watch my China table its on the verge of closing on itself, just to get away not to breath from my grieving air. Tonight I am in pain,my vision is overflowing with endless tears,I am alone because my brother left me and went away,he didn't even say goodbye,I didn't hear him cry or even try to live as he knew he had to go away in silence,carrying with him his lung cancer disease. He died alone on a hospital bed his heart betrayed him Why,he was still young 70 is not old,what was he feeling we will never know,was he afraid,was he sad,was he suffering,he was screaming they told me out of pain, he was struggling maybe wanting to remain alive to come back to see us at least one more time before his final breath will give up on him,was he delusional the whole morning till 6 30 PM when his soul became muted,sad,as God wanted him to join his late brother mother and father. My pain is not only I miss him,its in what state of mind he was in when he gave up, we will never know. This endless emptiness he left behind will linger forever. Now only I can wish you a goodbye.My children & I Will always Love you. Therese Bacha 14/4/2013