Home » Poems » Best » Simon Hamill » Best Simon Hamill Poems

Best Poems Written by Simon Hamill

Below are the all-time best Simon Hamill poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

The Weatherman Says

Good morning ladies and gentlemen,
I'm just looking out my door.
It has been raining through the night,
Looks like we'll get some more.
But don't worry all you gardeners,
The sun will be out soon.
Just as quick as this snow melts,
Your flowers will start to bloom.
The wind will blow away the leaves,
So you can cut your grass.
I am your local weatherman,
A right pain in the ass.

11/march/2022
You're a weather forecaster poetry contest
Sponsored by
Matt caliri

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

My Mommy Took Him, Nursery Rhyme

I want to tell you a story,
About a little boy,
Who went up to his bedroom
To get his favourite toy.
But when he opened his bedroom door
And popped inside his head,
He couldn't see him anywhere
And he had left him on his bed.
So he looked inside the wardrobe,
And he looked behind the chair,
He looked on the window sill
But still he wasn't there.
So he started emptying boxes
And pulling out the drawers,
He didn't know what was happening
He had never been gone before.
His mother heard the banging
And all the crashing about.
So she went upstairs to investigate
What the noise is all about.
When she saw him sat there
He had tears in his eye,
She had never seen him so upset
She nearly started to cry.
Between the sobs he told her
That he couldn't find his ted.
That he had come upstairs to get him
So he could go to bed.
She told him it was to early,
That they hadn't had their tea.
Then we can snuggle on the sofa
And watch a little TV.
Then we can go and get your ted,
So you don't have to cry.
You can put him back on your bed,
He will be nice and clean and dry.

Wanted to make this into a picture
Nursery rhyme book.
Edited on 20/4/2021.

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

Fan of Jan

I`VE BEEN READINGS LIMERICKS BY JAN,
TO EMULATE THE BEST THAT I CAN.
SHE CAN WRITE ABOUT POOH,
STICKY STUFF AND GOO.
WITH THE SAME SENSE OF HUMOUR AS A MAN.

NOW I WILL HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT DIRK,
ALWAYS ACTING AND BEING A JERK.
HE WOULD GET OUT HIS WEENUS,
SAYS IT LOOKS LIKE A P*N*S.
YOU CANT HELP BUT LAUGH AT THE BIG BERK.

SO THAT WAS MY LIMERICK FOR JAN,
I EMULATED THE BEST THAT I CAN.
BUT SHES THE LIMERICK QUEEN,
YOU ALL KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
KEEP MAKING US ALL SMILE, PLEASE JAN.

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

Gonna B Hot

Billowing bellows
Blatantly belching
Blowing cold air
Blazing the fire.

Bloated to bursting
Building the heat,
Burning the charcoal
Browning the meat.

Burgers are ready
Bangers are hot,
Bread buns are toasted
Brown sauce in the pot.


12/7/2020
Eve roper
Alliteration contest

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

Picking Up the Pieces

Flooded river, broken dam
Upturned trees,houses gone.
People shouting from out of sight
We need more help,we need more light.
Most have left, before the storm,
The few that remain
Are battered and torn.
Trying to salvage what they can,
Their lives are in tatters,
"How lucky I am"
The waters started receding,
Going back to the sea
Taking along, all their cherished memories.
a few days ago,
It was peaceful and calm,
Now devastation brings, panic and alarm.
To build a new life
With all that remains,
Praying to God
It doesn't come back again.

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

Snooker Mad

Hendry says that Ronnie,
The best to pick up a cue.
He's never seen me play
So that might not be true.
I had a break of twenty
When I was just a lad,
I'm getting on for sixty now
So a forty ain't so bad.
So come on then O'Sullivan
I challenge you to play,
I will give you a game for twenty quid
And you can pick the day.
I know you are a great player,
I watch you all the time.
You can make that cue ball sing
But I can make it rhyme.


A Strand (1071)
Sponsored by
Brian strand

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

Disasters Bring Life

Architectural disasters

               Can bring forth

           Reconstruction of life.

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

I Try To Resist

Forever
   
                   Feasting  famished,

           Flapjacks, frankfurter's, fajitas

       Flavoursome  food,  favourite  feast.

          Foreboding, forbidden, feeding

                   Fruitless,  fearful

                             Fat!



2/5/2021

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

My Old Van

I've just said goodbye to my van,
I shouldn't really cry I'm a man.
There wasn't really much I could do,
All the knocks and scrapes we've been through.
These last couple of years you've been sat there,
Sat on my drive all alone.
So I rang the man at the salvage yard,
Was shaking when I picked up my phone.
I kept you well fed and well watered,
Well shod to keep you on track.
Because you sat idle for over two years,
There was no way to turn the clock back.
Your joints have all seized,
Your oil has turned to gel.
When I tried to get you started,
You gave off a terrible smell.
So they sent a big lorry to collect you,
The man asked me the reason why.
The engine won't start and the joints have all seized,
But he was shocked when I started to cry.
So goodbye old gal I will miss you,
Your off to the scrapyard in the sky.
But if by a miracle you get running again,
I will wave if I see you pass bye.

Goodbye old van
21/11/2021

Details | Simon Hamill Poem

Miss You Wife

I've just found the love of my life,
I'm taking up golf
And getting rid of the wife.
My troubles have just started
I don't know what to do,
I can't work the dishwasher,
Or the microwave too.
I've got piles of dirty washing
All over the place,
My kitchen and bathroom
Are a total disgrace.
But I look on the bright side,
(I say this with a frown)
My house might be in a mess,
But my handicap is coming down.


22/may/2021