Short Hillbilly Poems

yard full of beer cans
cotton balls and human string
food,fun, drunks galore...

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Chawbacon bumpkin
Hillbilly from Hog Hollar
Brings ma a ripe pumpkin
And lets her keep her dollar...

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~The Slow Life~
I don’t care if you call me a Redneck
or call me a Hillbilly
Just call me for supper
...

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You're not just hillbilly ~ you're a person who can do what others can

December 28, 2023, 3:42 AM, PST, SPC...

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Asteroids, do not scare me
Had a great life, appeared on TV
Banjo in a folk group
In a hillbilly troupe
For brekkie, enjoy weiners and beans...

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Happy as a lark, they call her Lily
She teases farm boys, acting so silly
  Tells the corniest jokes
  The kind told by old folks
Lily's a pretty Hee-Haw Hillbilly...

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fiddler speeds music up
dancers are getting dizzy
crowd claps and stamps
you are in hillbilly country now
make some noise if you want to live
bluegrass is real here...

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There once was a real smelly hillbilly
Got a case of bad breath from hot chili
   He breathed, and banzai
   You thought you might die
He'd add curry powder willy-nilly...

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Not Ike, JFK, or Lyndon B.
Tricky Dicky, Gerald or Jimmy C
Ronald, HW, or Hillbilly Bill
“W”, Barack, Trump, and Biden still
Yet, I keep voting and hoping that somebody will
...

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Finding humor in the most common of things
Is the ability reserved for a bunch of us dingalings
Ya gotta be silly
A silly hillbilly
Even if you start accosting strangers in the spring ...

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Began wearing a bikini to the beach recently
Caused much jealousy especially with the fillies
My shape was the reason
Conjured up a threesome
My legs reminded them of a ravishing hillbilly...

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snow 
stampede 
suburban 

ghosts of factories 
shotguns checked shirts, red necks, 
rust the vultures waiting for  

memorial alabaster



6/22/19 
written by James Edward Lee Sr.
Clarity Pyramid/Form...

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Me thinks Hillbilly Vance is too highfalutin'
A big corporate crack pot? Yeah, yer darn tootin'
Gimme Jed Clampet any day
Jethro, Granny or Ellie May
Not a hack for a huckster who praises Vlad Putin!
...

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On top of old mango tree 
Climbing high, wild and free 
High above the mountain top
Wishing signal would not flop 

Writing my poetry 
On top of old mango tree 
While the skies up above 
Lauding the courage I have 

June 3, 2023...

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Strumming on my Guitar
Some hillbilly song
Simple harmony form
Style and roots in folk
Sometimes singing romance
Sentimentality
String accompanied song.

15.10.2020
‘Pleiades 2’ Contest
Music Genres: Country
Sponsor- Joseph May....

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Limerick : Once Hillbilly Bumpkin came to town

Once Hillbilly Bumpkin came to town
Citizens mocked this no-make-up clown
She hitched ride on red bus
To Piqued-Silly-Circus
And there let drop (her) feathered eiderdown.

© T. Wignesan – Paris,  2013...

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Hillbilly VP JD Vance
Surely hails from bad circumstance
Though spruced up by Yale
He acts much too male
To hide the wee lance in his pants


Note: Many other misogynists share this issue (DT, EM, 19 year-old college drop out Rye Country Day School wimp "Big Balls", etc).  
...

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Cradled in blue genre
Core of Cazun music
Cowboy folk melody
Carried to southern states
Consists of ballad tunes
Cliff Carlile’s hillbilly
Changed to hot western pop.

October 16, 2020
Syllable count : 6 each line
Checked on howmanysyllables.com
Contest : Pleiades 2
Sponsor : Joseph May...

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I’ve been silly, willy nilly,
Not your neighborhood, hillbilly, 
Silly is, as silly does,
Silly whiz, I was.

If my brain goes clink, clink, clink,
And my skull, begins to shrink,
What I think, my thinking got,
Linking think to thought.

Now I leave you, for this reason,
I'm alive, in dead skunk season.
...

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The Drunkard’s Loss
Dr. James E. Martin
©August, 2013

“I don’ts got no money”,
The hillbilly said.
“If I hads some money,
I’d be elsewhere instead.”

A question arose
About the loss of his dough.
“I should have adhered
To drinking more slow!”

He finally came around,
And discovered anew,
He should never be found,
With that drunken crew....

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Time for me to give the best man's toast

It's the moment that I've dreaded most

What can I say Mister 

You married your Sister 

I've had her and that's nothing to boast


In fact, last time we were together 

We did it with whips, chains, and leather

But bondage made her mean

So I broke it off clean

Now little Bro, you can have Heather...

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Call me hayseed, bumpkin, hillbilly, or crazy hick
Fresh inspiring country air surrounds me thick
I could run outside naked if I wanted
I live where deer and wild turkey are hunted

Wild boars wander up to my yard to root
My garden has veggies, my trees bear fruit
The sun I see is better than most ever find
Taking me away from the country would be unkind...

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(This is a fictional poem)

I'm a hillbilly who eats possums, squirrels and Chipmunks too.
Alvin and the Chipmunks came to my house and I turned them into stew.
They were cute and they had charm.
They thought I'd welcome them with open arms.
When they came to my house, it was a stupid thing to do.
Chip and Dale are at my door and I'm going to devour them too....

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Old hillbilly Huck was no prude;
He picknicked outside in the nude.
But a bee left a sting
On his ding-a-ling-ling
And neighbours heard something quite rude!



23.05.19
Syllable count : 88668

Bawdy Limerick Contest - Let's Keep It Pg-13 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin

Brevity Poetry Contest No More Than Six Lines Poetry Contest- Caren Krutsinger...

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Hillbilly magic in the heat of the day
Playing homemade fiddles in the middle of May.
Blowing into Grandpa’s jug with a merry hey.
Knee slapping melody with my cousin Shay.

Adding to Arkansas lazy ambiance in every way,
Black comb with waxed paper kazoos added to the fray.
Consuming Bob’s moonshine in secret shadows of dark gray.
Good ole’ fashioned downhome fun on a June like Saturday....

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