POOR BARNEY FIFE
There once was a young man named Barney Fife
He was a ladies man, but had no wife
He thought he was debonair
With lots of love he could share
But Deputy Fife is filled with great strife
Now he's laughed at by all of the women
He feels like they are rather condemning
His friend Sheriff Taylor said
Get those thoughts out of your head
And let them know you are worth redeeming
21 February 2019
For the contest sponsored by Joseph May
ive never met anyone in this life
as nervous as deputy barney fife
andy gave him a big gun
but a bullet only one
and will thelma ever become his wife
Limerick 4 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Joseph may
2/13/19
Barney was captured by some convicts one day
and so he never thought he'd get away
But dancing it proves
And Barney's slick moves
Helped Andy capture them without delay!
2-7-19
Barney was the Sheriff's right hand man
When danger beckoned, he took a brave stand --
Barney's voice rose so high
Bad guys reached for the sky --
Giggles! ~ Barney always forgot the game plan
February 04, 2019
Entry in "Limerick 4" Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Joseph May
One Day Barney Fife was practicing his quick draw.
He accidentally shot Thelma Lou, he broke the law.
Andy had no choice but to put Barney in jail.
But Andy let Barney out when he said he had a crop of marijuana to sell.
Barney offered Andy a fifty-fifty deal.
But Andy wanted it all, he decided to steal.
He shot poor Barney and dumped his body in Myers Lake.
Andy became furious when he learned the marijuana was fake.
The crop of marijuana turned out to be oregano.
Andy was arrested and jail was where he had to go.
Andy will be pounding rocks for the rest of his days.
The Sheriff soon learned that crime doesn't pay.
The life of this Fife was inane
No burglars did Barney detain
Got locked in the cell
As crooks bade farewell
Seems God gave him just half a brain
In comedy each plays a part
Aunt Bea cooked and huge was her heart
Old Otis loved booze
And Andy could schmooze
But Barney made others look smart
*February 3, 2019
For Joseph’s Limerick Four Contest
Howmanysyllables.com: 88558 88558
Barney the Deputy of Mayberry,
one bullet in pocket he did carry.
Before a crime wave could flood,
he would nip it in the bud.
To the law the Deputy was married.
2/2/19
There is an auld laddie near Fife
who sought for himself a good wife.
As no one would have 'im
he retired to a cabin
and drinks Scotch every day of his life.
Don Knotts played the role of Deputy Fife,
Whose tomfoolery created much strife!
He bungled all that he did!
Sheriff Taylor blew his lid,
Distressed by Barney's screw-ups that were rife!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
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