Best Tushy Poems

So You think the Toupee is Smart
An Orange little Toddler
Who Thought it was cool
To Hate People Who were Different
And Tweets without manners or rules

Where did...

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(Froggy)
His  big crooked smile; the bump on his nose;
His extra large feet with short stubby toes.

Eyes sort of popping beneath eyebrows bushy;
A spare tire...

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Little Miss Muffet

             (Modern Version)

      Little Miss Muffit...

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Politician; “IT’S NOT MY FAULT,”
as someone digs another burial vault.
If people think the job is cushy,
they can kiss my oval sitting tushy.

Politician; “I’M NOT TO...

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OVERWEIGHT HUSBAND:

Chubby
Hubby

FLABBY STOMACH:

Jelly
Belly

A WELL PADDED BOTTOM:

Cushy
Tushy

WINNIE THE POOH ON A DIET:

Skinny
Winnie...

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Whaat, whaat, whaat are you doing?
IT’S TIME TO GET OUT OF BED!!!
Buut, buut, oh, where was I?
Oh yeah, IT’S TIME TO GET OUT OF BED!!!

Hey...

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Upon the first date (decades ago) with the gal,
whose troth aye did pledge allegiance to wed
we agreed to dine at an ex-mex eatery
in north Wales,...

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My somewhat outsize ears and longish neck 
(I swear exist, which contrary to popular myth 
never seen by living persons) support this egg shaped 
(fried...

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aye savor the faire genetic blueprint 
   extant unique to each of us 
   with this quite alimentary aire 
 ...

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Down you upside hanging
By me danger dangling by
Bellybutton unsweatering

You sprite! Grin giggling
At me look laughing at
Legs in blue jean wrapping

You and tree branch playing
Just me...

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There once was an individual known as theKidster.
the Kidster was an immature adult mister. 
The oldest of four younger sisters. 
Got my ass beat many...

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Couched in the
     concept of a well,
     (which supplied the water
     for faded...

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While out and about
an unexpected over bare ring bout
to defecate arose,
     where sphincter asserted clout
and would excrete
    ...

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Just Now, I Started To Feel...
All Stopped Up With Writer's Block

Thus lack any idea about
     what to type out until aye
reach...

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Inapropos trois faux pas jokingly blurted out...

yesterday August 30th, 2022.

The following fictitious account
predicated upon words spilling
out me mouth before taking time
to think through how sarcastic...

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