Best Kippers Poems

If I were a prisoner on death row
just hours away from execution
I would NOT order a meal of calamari with ratatouille,
filet mignon with truffles and Strawberry Sherbet.

I would reject a plate of Duck Liver Terrine with Confit Quail
garnished by Baby Leeks and Porcini mushrooms.
I would...

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I feel so proud when I see our national flag raised
and sing our Anthem ‘Oh land of our birth’
This island is not the place where I was born
but there’s no place on earth I’d rather be
with mountains and hills, a patchwork of fields
and the ocean...

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Rum felt a chill which he couldn’t explain
Had mum left the freezer door open again?
He went to the kitchen and muttered, “Aha!”
The freezer door was just a little ajar

Inquisitive kittens, as everyone knows
Would not simply push that door shut with their nose
He just couldn’t shut...

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There was a yeti called Kippers,
Who tried to use toe nail clippers,
But his toes were too long,
And it went badly wrong,
So now he wears floral slippers....

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What a beautiful breakfast
This hotel  embraces your stay
Everything you could wish for
To keep u going all day

The prunes I had were lovely
So juicy and fat
Now feeling a rumble in my stomach
Was I wise to eat that.

The cooked breakfast is not for me
So I looked for...

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Don’t worry about being thinner
Get yourself off down the pub
Then go home to a good British dinner,
Of British traditional grub

Delicious roast beef of old England
Served up with a thick Yorkshire pud
With roast spuds and cabbage and carrots
Plus gravy in which the spoon stood

What’s wrong with...

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Mr Wiz, Munchkin Land
Be so kind to lend a hand...

Cartwheeling cottage? how daft is that
Landed quite safely, all level and flat
Some midget fellow said, who else heard that
I think ‘Wicked Westie’ might just have gone splat

Tin men and lions and blokes full of straw
Red shoes...

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 Our mind is capable of passing beyond 
the dividing line we have drawn for it.
 Beyond the pairs of opposites, of which
  the world consists - other, new insights
 begin."  --Herman Hesse, on Thought "

Controlled Fallacy 

I could be an enchanted dragonfly,
the...

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Rum and Raisin, on the mat, were playing with their toys
Their humans had the tv on to give some background noise
Rum said, “Raisin, there is something that I want to do,
To meet a man from far away, whose name is Tim Bucktoo.”

Raisin said, “I’ve heard...

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i wait at night, look for your star
i feel you close, but bodys so far
taken away, removed all your pain
your words and your wisdom, were the things that i gain 
long late night chats, getting blind drunk
sharing a beer, or smoking some skunk
i miss all...

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TIT-FOR-TAT PERSIAN CAT
A young man and his chic Persian cat
Help each other out tit-for-tat
He feeds her fresh kippers
She brings him his slippers
Why can’t more couples be thoughtful like that?

10/13/22...

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When the cows come home to roost,
	or the crows are grazing grass,
It’s time I wrote a rhyme,
	until yesterday returns to pass!
If bats in the belfry stay sleeping,
	until the clock strikes the noon of day,
Tis then the ghouls awaken,
	keeping to their regular, natural way.

If fish in...

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A framed pizza cannot be described as a Mohawk hairstyle in a salon. For if an iron tumbles into a salad bar then ionised tomatoes could become very afraid. Such is the agreeable format for a lettuce leaf. Radiant radishes ridiculing rind. And a dip....

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We live by the sea, just we two, you and me
It offers us all that we need
From our heads to our toes, you make all of our clothes
From sea grass and sometimes sea weed

If our ocean provides it, you will utilise it
I so like the...

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If I really have to wear a tie, best it is a pure silk one.
I have seen the silken threads of a thousand moths
spun on a loom.

I have seen the nimble hands of the workers
at the loom.
The meek shall inherit.

I once had a 'kipper' tie
it...

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