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Wrong Bread For Fred

Wrong bread for Fred here I am sick in bed got the chills and aches in my head called the pharmacy and spoke with Ned was told of a remedy of oatmeal bread thought that was new so I tried it instead smeared some butter and jelly was spread laid down with a book that I hadn’t read Did not like the novel , the cover mislead. still feeling the blahs I was getting worse hoped that I make it without calling a hearse. got the bible out and looked for a verse thought it might help to relieve this curse. I called back to the pharmacy asking for Ned was told he didn’t work here, it’s a bakery instead I had dialed the wrong number to get the med they thought I was ill from not being fed. that’s why they told me to get some bread I went to the bakery and told them I was Fred Ned was there and told me he had misread ‘ ginger bread would have been better instead” bought some gingerbread and some whipped cream thought this was unusual and kind of extreme perhaps a remedy, am hoping not a scheme I’m sick enough to just wash downstream. the gingerbread went into the oven to bake ate most if it but then my stomach began to ache felt dizzy enough but not like floating in a lake what could be wrong with me, it was only a cake. was admitted to the hospital, had an abdominal scan they asked me if I had eaten cereal with bran told them I made a cake in a non stick pan added some prunes that I had in a can. was put in bed dressed with just a flimsy gown wasn’t enough material to go all the way around where’s the rest of the sleeper I asked with a frown ‘there is none, you’ll be spotted in case you skip into town” I need to find a way to slip out the door where’s my bag with clothes that I wore the bed has an alarm sensor if you try to soar using a bedpan will be quite the chore. wrapped myself up in sheets, hiding my buns ran down the back stairway before morning comes Security frantically searching and yelling to everyone “gingerbread man is on the loose with the runs”!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019




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Book: Reflection on the Important Things