Turn around then

Turn around then: As you walked up the stairs, Which I want to walk up too, I am glad to have such a self-ability, To not let myself run away again or choose another way. There are multiple stairs. But I want to go this way. You wouldn't just fall on me, or I don't know what you would say? You don't even look at me. And if you did, I would pick you up with both arms but not ask if you are doing alright. When you stumbled, I heavily flinched. You never hit me, But you hit me physically somehow. Because anything you do or any touch Feels like a threat. Even though walking up the stairs had nothing to do with me. When you suddenly stopped at the end of the stairs, I would never take the seconds to ask: "May I skip you?" like my past self would do. When I skipped you, And accidentally pushed your shoulder, which made you lose balance, It felt somehow good. But I didn't really care anyway so