This Just In- Spell Chex Mishap

"we can only call it a tragedy" so said principal (name not to be used or mention the school) "the boxes of spell chex suggests using butter milk to get the optimum amount and more of your daily fat intake, but mistakingly soy milk was actually used" refusing to say any more we talked with some of the faculty, staff and students of this highly prestigious catholic elementary school who bore witness to what was already said to only be called a tragedy but a tragedy of errs that shakespeare would make comedic asking one of the surviving students what did happen? shakingly she said "we were told never to use the f word so i didn't know what that means but there we're a lot of f's floating in my bowl" stopping she started uncontrollably crying so we asked one of the kitchen staff he said "at first i didn't see what was being read but when one of the older nuns passed out i ran over to see what was up and aboot so i looked in one of the student's bowls and he not knowingly was poking the word it starts with a c and like the uvula in your mouth but is between a woman's i can't say anymore" so it seems that spell chex should not be rated G but as it's name suggests X back to you and the news i'll be at the scene for any further details