The Rip Van Winkle Story

Now, here's the story of Rip Van Winkle The true story, not the lie They always want to hide the truth I'll just never understand why You see, Rip Van Winkle was married To a woman, who always nagged And that poor dude was bored all the time Cause his internet always lagged So, he climbed up in his recliner And decided to take a little nap When, out of the blue, the Sleeping Spider Went and crawled up in his lap Now, Rip knew about that spider But still, he just couldn't resist For if he let that spider bite him They'd be no "honey do" list Well, that spider sunk his fangs in Then jumped back on the floor It wasn't long, Rip closed his eyes And man, that guy could snore Now, a wicked smile even crossed his face As he leaned back in his chair For, when he awoke, she'd would be gone But Rip, just simply didn't care Well a hundred years just flew by And his wife was surely dead But when he finally opened his eyes She lay beside him in the bed She awoke while still clutching "The list" for a hundred years For the spider had bitten her also And it brought the man to tears But this story has a happy ending Cause dial-up was a thing of the past They decided to finally get broadband And his internet was fast at last