Damian Cranney | + Follow Poet |
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The Man In the Dock

Judge Mayer On the bench did sit,
Coldly appraising the man in the dock,
The man in the dock was, unperturbed,
He gave the judge a knowing wink,
At least that's what the judge did think, 
For which he was not at all prepared,
and it gave him quite a shock.

“Now, now, my man we’ll have none of that”,
and then he noticed he was wearing a hat,
“You cannot wear that hat in court,
take it off right now I know your sort,”
The man stayed cool as cool can be,
I'm sorry M’Lord, I cannot comply,
I have to wear it and that's no lie.

“You have to wear it, don't be absurd,
That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.”
“It’s true M’Lud”, the man decried,
“Let me explain and then you decide. 
It's part of my job I'm a beekeeper by trade,
It’s how I keep them all warm when I go on Parade”.

I've never heard anything so ridiculous as that
people don't keep bees living in their hat,
If you don't take it off the sergeant will remove it.
Alright said the man if you really insist, 
And he ripped his hat off with a twist of the wrist,

The room suddenly was filled, with a swarm full of bees,
and everyone there just dropped to their knees 
Clear the court said the judge to the sergeant at arms,
As in panic he turned on all the alarms,
And ran into his chambers, locking the door.
No one was left but the man in the dock,
And as he walked out the door of the court,
He turned to a friend waiting under the clock,
Works every time with that judge’s sort!

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