Skeletons In the Closet
Let your skeletons out of the closet and let them dance with mine, the way that our bodies once moved together in an unspoken of time
I am one of these skeletons, maybe your biggest one of all, you keep me hidden away in the back where my memory you can’t recall
I guess for you it’s just easier this way, to lock away your demons instead of placing them on display
You only want to show others the fake side of you, almost as though you’re too ashamed to admit that you have imperfections too
Not on the outside, you’re a vision, and looking upon you one never wishes to look away, but if they could see underneath your skin then what would they say?
Could they take you for what you really are underneath the disguise? Would they still wish to look into those alluring eyes?
Would the darkness they see make them turn towards the light, or would they hand over their souls to you, just to feel alive?
I ask these questions because I once asked them to myself, but back then I was blinded by the slip of your tongue and the tales that you would tell
Your voice was like a song that was written to only be heard by me, and your touch was so erotic that it brought me to my knees
Maybe it was because our love was a sin and we reveled in the wrong, maybe it made it more exciting knowing that both of us could have been caught
Maybe it was innocence and naivety that led me astray, a longing to feel something even if it wasn’t love just to have a taste
Just to feel something because as you I was dead inside, but dancing inside of your arms my spirit had never felt so alive
Maybe it was the forbidden kisses and the borrowed words that were spoken, I don’t know why you threw me in the closet, but you left the door cracked open
I guess because although you hurt me you didn’t want to completely banish me to the night, you knew that I wasn’t strong enough at least not then to survive
I couldn’t ward off my own demons let alone the ones that you brought along to play, so instead of dealing with me in the right way you just chose to walk away
Leaving a slip of light that would filter in through the crack, whispering into the depths of my soul there was a chance you would be back
Why else would you not slam the door completely on what we had? I believe that you weren’t finished with our story but for now you had to leave it in the past
At least until you were strong enough emotionally to deal with your own pain, but years went by and there I sat in the darkness where I had been chained
With nothing but wasted time and memories that I grew to wonder were they even true, did we really share a love affair, or was that me talking to myself in the dark pretending to be you?
Had I been driven mad to the point where I couldn’t process the thoughts in my own mind? Had my eyes fabricated visions of you just to pass the time?
So, until I see the light burn my eyes from the opening of the door, I will lie here upon this makeshift bed that is nothing but a cold, hard floor
But in my heart, I don’t believe that you will be the one to release me, you’re terrified to admit to yourself that back in the darkness there is still me
I believe that when the time is right when your skeletons will make their appearance known, someone else will be at the opening of that door and then your truth will have to be told
She isn’t aware of the skeleton in the back of the closet that hasn’t in years seen the light of day, when she asks the one question you have been dreading all of these years whatever will you say?
Will you act surprised that you know nothing of this decaying mess, or will you be honest and finally lay my skeleton to rest?
Will you carefully dispose of me the way that you should have years ago, or will you deny everything until your last breath that way she will never know?
Will you just push me further in and trample all over me? Will you make this closet my grave because you can’t face your reality?
Will you let me go, or will you make me lie? To save yourself from the damage that you once caused between you and I
I once called what we had love because that is what I believed I was in, but all that we were was darkness that settled deep down under each other’s skin
Damaging each other’s souls and destroying each other’s minds, tearing apart our hearts all because of our lies
Not just the ones that we told others, no the ones that we told ourselves, that we were doing nothing wrong but really, we were paving our own way to Hell
We were just two skeletons that went for a dance, and got entangled in a trap and then once we crossed the threshold there was no going back
See you’re just as guilty and as sinful as me, but I don’t place you in the closet and hide you like a secret I wear you shamefully for all to see
I will never banish you to the darkness because I am seeking the light, I just pray that you will let me go one day, open the door, and let me out, make what once was wrong, right.
Copyright © Amanda Kinzer | Year Posted 2022
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