Raised by a narcissist

Until last Wednesday I never thought I'd been bought up by narcacist, the thought made me distraught But then the memories flooded back in A narcissist raised me, now let me begin I thought of my childhood as safe and happy Never rich but always savvy There's nothing I ever went without Apart from love, I see that now Micro chips for every meal My mum grieving so not ideal Saturdays sat alone in the dark Snooker in the background made it's mark Friends they would come and go Drunken fights in the house was a great show Tenants falling down the stairs Mums friends always over in tears Dad wasn't in the picture, not much I knew He died apparently but that was untrue Don't get me started we'll be here all night Let's try and keep this poem polite! My stepdad is an angry man Was scared of him from the second they began Mum took his side no matter what A grown man Vs child fight for the top spot I'm the black sheep, I've been condemned A narcissist's love feels so real A narcissist feeds off fear If your vulnerable they are always near Because I dared to take my stand From the family I was banned She rationed her love until there was nothing left Looking back it was always neglect I sat down and thought today What I'm writing is not nice to say I feel bad my words might make her sad That's the narcissist for you, l now understand Through all my sadness she will never see Her actions are what damaged me She'll play the victim, of course she's right A narcissist will always win the fight What iv learnt today' is not nice But if I can, here's some advice Never feed a narcissist your soul For once you do they have control They will twist and turn, kick and bite They will do anything to make you believe their right You'll be conditioned forever, it's sad to say Deep down inside you'll never get away She's had a grip all my life I believed everything including her lies My mum is not a demon to me But she is dark, cold and mean A narcissist hides in plain site A narcissist feeds off misery for their delight My mothers a narcissist, the thoughts all new The damage done is beyond repair Still don't know how we got here I can say it all day for all to hear My mum broke my heart, I won't ever heal A narcissist raised me, how did I survive A narcissist raised me, am I that way inclined? A narcissist's love is just a loan You'll pay it back with blood & bone