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Morris

The very first time I saw him I thought he looked sublime Never dreaming in all the world That one day he would be mine, He was not what you'd call 'a head turner' He didn't stand out in a crowd But in my eyes, Morris was gorgeous When I was with him, I always felt proud Life with him was never at 'snails pace' We spent many an hour cruising town And although he lived life 'in the fast lane' He never, once, let me down Always there, exactly when needed On him I could always depend Through time we became unseparable He was a solid, reliable friend, We would visit all maner of places He was full of drive and vim With Morris I found the freedom I would never have known but for him Then one day, it was all over, I knew life wouldn't be the same That nothing on earth would fill the void Of never seeing Morris again, It broke my heart when we parted Although I knew he had to go And I wept, as I handed the stranger the keys To drive away 'Morris'.....my metro!!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2009




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Date: 2/17/2010 12:43:00 PM
Oh my, the wee Metro Janette, so many were made it was that popular, dinky poem >> James
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Date: 5/13/2009 1:31:00 AM
Hi Janette, in the words of the great poet, er, Shaggy, It Wasn't me. I think your messages somehow got confused. Paul
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Date: 5/11/2009 6:11:00 AM
Janette. I like this as it shows a great skill in rhyme use. You may use rhymes that are 'obvious' but you use them well. Although the poem has a flow to it I think that flow is interupted in lines 8 and 9. I think you could cut out 'When I was . . .' in line 8 and 'whith him' in line 9. Also cut '.....my metro!!' in the last line because the reader is already aware whazt Morris is by the penultimate line. Read it through first and see if you get what I mean. Lovely writing though!
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Book: Shattered Sighs