Inspired Whinings

I always liked country music, but never could figure out what country it was from. I will shortly be a contestant on "American Idle" When my mother first saw a microwave at my brother's house in Ohio, in the 1980's- she told me how impressed she was at how friendly it seemed. Everytime she used it, it said "Hi" to her. True story. I heard about this old movie- "Twice Sold Ales"- seems a sinister bartender would get a customer drunk, and re-cyle his urine, and served it as "ale" Ugh! Makes me wanna wash! I had a nightmare last night- Angelina Jolie was knocking at my door, and I was in bed with Phylis Diller. Ugh! I got the video "Girls Gone Wild", and was (almost) surprised to see my wife as a featured star! Ugh. I just signed up to be a contestant on "American Idle"...I should clean up! If not on the game, at least here, in my home! Ugh! I think, therefore I think. I think, therefore I drink. I signed up for a "cruise to nowhere"- I wound up in a rowboat on the Hudson River. I like to consider myself a "pimple on the a_s of life"! No more from "Tootsie Roll Breath" for now. Keep on smiling!! I get a kick out of the "Forms of Poetry" list....Like I really care!! Pretentious crock of crap!! Check how I list this One!!