Insanity

i still think about coming back being with you doing the same things we used to do it would be so easy to sink back into old ways to think of you the way i used to to look at you the same way i once did but we’ve done this twice already and some people say third times a charm but i think at this point we’re just holding on to love that shouldn’t exist the definition of insanity is doing the same thing expecting a different result so what are we expecting that it will work that we wont hurt each other that we’ll make it to that picture perfect future when i look at it i think we could do it maybe if we tried harder had more understanding maybe if i was healthy but then again shouldn’t i expect the same from you you think you are you think drinking every day is just something you’re choosing you think not being able to show affection is because you're tired the mention of your trauma affecting you is quickly shut down i'm fine you say i don't think about it you should too oh how i wish i could show you what its like to be free of the things that weigh down your brain but you cant explain it you cant understand unless you’ve felt it i'm standing near the end of the tunnel i can see the light and i'm running towards it i tell you look but you’re so far back you don't even believe me you say i don't see it that i'm behind you further in the darkness but you couldn’t be more wrong