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I Gotta Laugh So I Don'T Cry

A sweet, lonely lady of, perhaps, ninety-two Stared into my eyes as she nodded her head Squeezing my hand ever so tightly, she said, “You’re my kind of man. I suppose you’ll do!” I’ve been propositioned a few times before Not more than every widowed man, I suspect, Elderly widows suffering from benign neglect But never so obviously at the sanctuary door! The twinkle in her eyes betrayed her intent As though she had no time left for idle chatter She stood tall, and got straight to the matter, I dared not ask her exactly what she meant. “So, how about a date?” bluntly, she asked, Her uninhibited approach left me no place to go A younger pastor would’ve replied a simple no, I stammered, stuttered, and stood fully aghast. I thought she might not remember anything I said So, I thanked her and said, “I’ll try to find a time.” For a moment I felt like a pitifully inept mime, Then, seconds later, I was wishing I were dead.
Written November 14, 2022 Submitted to “Pick-a-Title Vol 33" Poetry Contest Sponsored by Edward Ibeh

Copyright © | Year Posted 2022




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Date: 12/15/2022 8:44:00 AM
Great write, I kind of love this little old lady! No time to waste, get it girl! Haha congrats on your win!
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Date: 12/15/2022 6:03:00 AM
Quite a fantastic piece here, Milt:-) Last line made me laugh! Heartiest congratulations on your win in my contest!
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Date: 11/17/2022 12:58:00 PM
Oh, this is rich! You forgot to tell us how the date went.
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/17/2022 1:51:00 PM
Hasn't happened yet!
Date: 11/15/2022 6:46:00 PM
Pretty funny, yet the tender awkwardness shines through. Imagine!
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/15/2022 6:50:00 PM
Thanks, gw. I was just having fun with it, and I hoped it would turn out funny. I suppose that remained to be seen, but you liked it, so bingo!
Date: 11/14/2022 1:03:00 PM
Some ol’ gals have a nerve, or is it a verve? An amusing read Milton… Belle
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/14/2022 3:02:00 PM
Although this is fictional, Belle, I did have propositions very soon after my wife died.
Date: 11/14/2022 12:53:00 PM
Haha brilliant write Milton, nice to know you've still got it. Good luck in the contest. Tom
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/14/2022 3:03:00 PM
Can be rather embarrassing, Tom. Although, I'm learning to cope!
Date: 11/14/2022 12:37:00 PM
Haha, hopefully she forgot. You were gentle man , Many blessings my friend
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/14/2022 12:42:00 PM
Thanks, Eve. This is fictional, but I did get a few propositions when I was a pastor. It always amazed me, particularly since I was married. I always thought it so disrespectful to Deb.
Date: 11/14/2022 12:14:00 PM
lol Milt. Did she pull out a calendar for you to pick a day? Great entry for Ed's contest.
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/14/2022 12:45:00 PM
I suppose she didn't think I'd respond as I did, Jenna. Fictional. I had a lot of trouble figuring out the last two stanzas, so I hope what I came up with worked. Thanks.
Date: 11/14/2022 12:04:00 PM
That's a sweet poem, Milton, and it rhymes and flows so well. Poor old lady and poor you! You gotta watch those old gals! :)
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L Milton Hankins
Date: 11/14/2022 12:46:00 PM
That's true. This is fictional. But, actually, I had a woman hitting on me about two weeks after Deb died. I was flummoxed! I wasn't ready for that sort of thing to happen.

Book: Shattered Sighs