How Hot Was It

It was hot yesterday. How hot was it you ask? It was so hot outside that I'd rather be in class doing math, It was so hot when I heard a joke that was funny I actually forgot to laugh. How hot was it at one o'clock? Hot enough to make me feel like I didn't have time to check my watch, Hotter than Megan Fox wearing wool socks with Crocs Walking across hot coals to ask me to elope and I said "No thanks, it's too hot." How hot was it? Like a billion degrees. I wasn't even willing to sneeze, Because in this heat, That would bring me to my knees. I felt like I was Lebanese in the summer, Or a Burmese Python putting the squeeze on a woolen sheep with a sunburn. How how was it? Would you like to discuss it? Hotter than the temper of some guy who's Kate Upton's cousin, Hot enough to cook a Tuscan Raider without an oven, Hot enough to make Darth Vader sweat in the vacuum of space over Russia. How hot was it? I was in a state of coldness withdrawal, I wanted to jump off the Empire State Building just for the breeze from the fall. It was hot enough to make PETA say it was okay to rain cats and dogs, And believe me, I was appalled.