Get It All Backwards, Part I

Maria wanted to no longer think, and stared broodingly upon her mixed drink, she’d already had one, still felt depressed, hoped it would mellow once she drank the next. But then a young man sat down by her side, said,”Hey beautiful, what’s with the sad eyes?” She just stared at him, not believing this, the man couldn’t be more than twenty-six. She said,”Shouldn’t you find someone more you size, I’m not some bimbo, I am thirty-five. I have no time for the lines you would say, I did not come here looking to get laid.” He just smirked at her, said,”I will admit, the thought of you naked stirs me a bit, but I wasn’t joking, what I said before, the look on your face, I just can’t ignore. “I’ve seen it often, abject depression, and I learned first hand its horrid lessons, my brother once had it, suffered for years, turned his young life into trauma and tears. “Until two years back, he could take no more, we found hi dead on his own bedroom floor, I see the same fatigue now in your face, so if you need to talk, I’ll hear what you say.” She didn’t know if to believe him at first, but in his eyes she sensed genuine hurt, said,”If you ant to help some strange woman, I guess it’s not my place to stop you then. “Let’s start with my job, I’m an attorney, growing up that was all I wanted to be, all my teachers told me I would blaze a trail, I was woman, I was strong, I wouldn’t fail. “They told me I could do anything, find a career that would be fulfilling, I would prove that I was nobody’s fool, I crushed undergrad, and breezed through law school. “Got myself a job at a prestige firm, made a name for myself, opponents I burn, I lived out the dream, I guess you could say, and last year I pulled down $900K. “I’m that ‘strong’ woman with the great career, I make ‘the patriarchy’ shiver with fear, you think all this success would be enough, but every day I feel like I’ve screwed up. “I’ve been noticing it now for a while, this instinctive urge to hold a child, to be surrounded by a family, and then I think it is too late for me. “They said career comes first, family can wait, but who wants to marry women of my age? And even if I did find the right guy, between dating, then marriage, time would fly by. “They once told me that I could have it all, but ‘empowerment’ seems to lead to a fall, and now I no longer know what to do, my job cannot love me, that much is true." CONCLUDES IN PART II.