Fake King Harry Kane

("FAKE") King Harry Kane... also unknown as (D. Lucian Null) Sprung from the best over active imagination damnedest confection of this fictitious writer of fiction earnest and frankly hoof avers zealous zest (with sud'n soap er ream conviction, undressed compunction, and especially divine collusion), who proudly didst wrest (however wrung er... right), the presidency, (you guessed correctly) from the ghostly buster of Honoré d Balzac ("FAKE alias Hillary Clinton), and bankrolled by Univest in coordination with Ham R. Sickle, lest who didst hack private emails of said Democratic contender (during the 2016 presidential election) successfully, and sufficiently (amidst sudden unrest) did (ill) legally nominally sought after highest stakes political con test the dub bait hubble, and admits rigged a satisfactory farrago, which predictably suppressed any fat (or slim) chance (Hill's Billy) more unlikely getting struck by lightening, while climbing Mount Everest), which non barren smugness of mine brought elation, messed up supposedly clinched Clinton win, whence foretold by gerrymandered Oracle of Delphi, which prophetess imp pressed particularly how nefarious nest of thieves spearheaded, schemed, and sabotaged visa vis ex post facto American government didst discover sinister, sly, and "NON FAKE" surreptitious shenanigans which laughably vaunted I accord to Trump "stupid, weak, lightweight" Central Intelligence Agency.