Digging for Daylight

This utter silence is stone cold There's no gaze upon the sinner This hell has got a wicked hold And it feels just like a winter When I fought the darkest demons I just fought them empty-handed I pushed through all doubt and reason And I nearly couldn't bear it Why would you still demand of me To bend my shattered knee again Without attending to my needs Or is it fine to just pretend I suppose you'll answer one day While I'm digging for some daylight I'll be gripping all these questions While I'm begging you for insight Are you even up there waiting Could you even hate me asking Or for choosing to just let go Of a life that's everlasting By accepting to wield my sword I choose to carry my own weight I'll start to reshape my own world While carving out a better fate