Blossom

Blossom Frank Halliwell Just grab a seat on that stump lad, and I'll take centre stage, With a yarn about a small brown donk, and a lad about your age. And thanks much for the offer, but I'll give the beer a miss, I've got half a cup of coffee here, and I'll be drinking this. One afternoon, just as the sun was starting to go down, Dad chased him on an errand, to the little shop in town. Now this young fella blazed along, the old ute fairly flew, About as close to the speed o' light as the four wheel drive would do. And as he roared up a small hill, just standing past the top, Was a jenny donk with a half grown foal, and the young lad couldn't stop. The jenny was the closest and she took the deadly blow, But her body saved her little one, although she'd never know. The young lad checked the jenny out, but she'd begun the flow, To that great green meadow in the sky, where all the donkeys go. The foal was badly bashed up, with her hide all torn and slashed, But her eyes were bright and she might be right...stitched up where she was gashed. So he huffed and puffed and heaved and swore, and he got her in the back, And he set out for the vet that lived a bit further down the track. And the vet, he laboured mightily to save that battered foal, And by dawn's first light after that long night, he finally reached his goal. So young lad took the small donk home, and in the course of time, They left the territory, for Queensland's sunny clime. He finished up in barracks, for the company took him in, And gave him work, down in the mine, scratchin' round for tin. He'd seen the poincianas bloom, their crimson flowers aflame, And so he called her 'Blossom', and that became her name. Now the Isa's not the most thrilling place there is along the track, So he taught young Blossom a trick or two, to help take up the slack. To stand with forelegs on his shoulders, (gawd, that lad was game!) And to stretch out on an empty bunk, a trick that brought her fame. For the common ass is pretty smart, her funny looks aside, And she soon preferred the soft-sprung bed to the cold hard dirt outside. And though the blokes would chase her out when time had come for rest. She'd soon sneak back through the open door to the bed she liked the best And most of the guys didn't really mind, and felt a little quiet pride, In this funny donk who made them laugh, but left her souvenirs outside. Ah yes, and she had one more quirk, that I'll add to this log, On a hot day, she'd walk up to you, and lick you, like a dog. I guess it was a need for salt, that's found in many forms To fill her need she found a source on miners sweaty arms. Now the office took a new man on, and assigned him to his shift, To start on monday morning, at the number seven lift. And this was friday, fairly late, so with the weekend free, He took his wad and went to town, to celebrate, you see. So several hours later, and much the worse for wear. This fella staggered back again, without a single care. He managed to remove his clothes, with a lot of crashing sound, Then held on tight with knuckles white, as the room went round and round Eventually he fell asleep as the booze turned out his light, And Blossom, at the same time, gave up grazing for the night. She came on tiptoe down the room, as only donkeys can. And gazed in silent disbelief at this new, intruding man. Who'd taken without sanction, her comfy little bed. And left our donk with no good place to rest her weary head. She put her head down close to his and snuffled in his ear Well then, perhaps a slurp or two, might bring him past the beer. At last in desperation, she put her lips up to his ear And loosed a mighty donkey's bray, that those in town could hear, And followed with a lot of slurps to help her win the toss, And ensure that he would stay alert 'till she got her point across. Yes lad, I woke in terror, and much dismay at those Two big brown eyes like dinner plates, and enormous roman nose. And ears like radar dishes and a voice like a cannon's roar. So I up, and out, and down the road, and I run for a mile or more. So that was when I took the pledge and swore right off the grog. And vowed that I'd spend no more nights in alcoholic fog. And when I feel that stirring urge, I'll go out and get some grub, And never, never, ever, chat up sheilas in a pub. I've spent lots of nights, out on the grog, when we had got our pay, And woke beside some dreadful dogs, come the cold gray light of day. But let me tell you matey, no one's ever seen a sight, Like her that woke me with a kiss, that awful friday night. ***