Apathy

You know that feeling? That empty existence, That lack of emotion, It doesn't make much sense.. It's lonely and hollow, And only tears follow... A rut that you're stuck in, A hole that you've dug... You don't know how to crawl out of, And you move like a slug? Where everything looks grey, And you're eyes are tired... And it takes all you have to stay together... The smiles are fake, The eyes lost their spark... All you want to do is lie alone and cry in The quiet and dark... You feel so alone around a hundred people, And you try to laugh to keep from crying, Because you're so exhausted from trying... You just want to escape it all... Your mind, your thoughts, your feelings You don't want to hurt, and you don't want to bawl... You want to smile, without having to force it, You want to laugh without a rehearsal You don't want to be the shell you're becoming... You want to feel alive and hear your heart drumming To be numb or to feel, both have their downsides, To smile or to cry, I still can't decide...