A Reflection of my Bipolar Mania

Have you ever touched the universe And felt its power course through your veins? Felt the alleviation of all your pain? Have you ever woken up in the morning And realized you were at the very center Of all creation? That everything happening to you Had a simple explanation? Have you held a superpower in your hands And genuinely believed you could change the world? That you are more than just a simple girl, I have. I have lived as an immortal god With a divine purpose. Born again without the curses, Do you know how Jesus felt When he knew his role Was to be sacrificed For the good of us all? I know it completely. I have lived ten thousand lifetimes simultaneously And seen the world through a fractured perspective. How everything is connected. I have seen the reincarnation of my grandfather As a golden retriever no longer bothered, I watched time reverse And gave birth to my own universe. Have you ever been so miserable That your mind creates a world of its own for you to hide in? A world of gods and heroes, A world of ghosts and goblins? A world where that pain you can’t run from Means something other than a miserable existence. Can you blame me for getting lost in such a world? For having no resistance, Look around you. Is that what you call happiness? With all your goals and all your classiness? You don’t know the meaning of the word. Of all the things you have incurred, Do you know what you would feel, If that desire you covet deep inside you was real? You think you know misery? Your mind knows all your darkest secrets. Every time you spoke to Jesus, What would you do, If that mind started to use those secrets against you? What if you could touch and taste and smell something imaginary? Could you tell the difference between that and reality? Knowing that if you get it wrong You will be locked away from society. Would you tether yourself to what you are told is true And hope that society isn’t just as delusional as you? Do you know what it means To truly pull yourself back from the edge? To live on the cusp between life and death? Have you nearly killed yourself While laughing uncontrollably? No? Well, this is my story.