Addiction
At fourteen years of age this addiction became a plague, I was sure to seek a way so I can get it in my face/ Poor scheme's are played now I'm missing lots a pape', the life of a drug feen, living on a high a day/ Ive gone a' stray, blazed trails along the way, victim to a pill high its a prison when you still dry/ Chemicals are bill nye when the will dies and thoughts of fear and dread pierce the head and kill vibes / I craved the effects and its potency, I was so blind to my actions that even my own friends didn't notice me, like I'm in a coma sleep / A slave to pharmaceutical's, as scars flowing through my skull got me seeing a departed beautiful / Trapped inside myself but my mind is hardly cubicle, I couldn't see through it so I just felt it was cool and so... / I became that kid in school acting unusual, but nobody thought that the drugs would ever do this yo / I was so confused a teenage addict feeling hopeless too, but the drugs were my only way to cope with fools / Eventually came the broken rules because I was too high and couldn't even notice dude, doing what I can but with all the negativity surrounding me what am I suppose to do / I know its seems like the emotions got the best of me, but thats not it.. Its was the side effects of the drugs infecting me / Broken open unexpectedly I felt flowing oceans were caressing me, the high was the best of me but the come down was depressing me / I was lost and looking for a way out, so slangin became my main route but the fact that it was hooking me with a steady pay count / Only gave me a way to get more to base out, the ignorance was overwhelming how bad I would just space out and forget what these chemicals are doing to my brain now / Escaped doubt with drugs flowing through my viens sounds like my highest desire, as my fate mounts making me the wisest denier / Lies set the fire until the supplies became my messiah, late nights and no sleep has my mind feeling tired but i didn't care as long as the lines kept me wired /
This is the second verse wonder how this will play out, but since imma keep it honest this is probably where i'll fade out/ I mean I'm just a local kid trying to find out what the fuck the focal is, I try and notice shit then write it down and hope it sticks / This is a real story i didn't make this to appeal to Maury, drugs are real and gory and they always seem to lead to living poorly / So honestly I had to revolve my philosophy and see myself in 3rd person which brought to me a perspective way different then what I thought to see / I saw all these problems are constantly being brought along with me cause I need a high too be what I personally think I got to be.. [or want to be] / Start to see it clear in plain view and look beyond the denial and blame too, these regrets are what made you and the stress is the aftermath and what it came too / Addiction is a based proof going down the drain tube is the moment when you stop feeling sane dude / Living in vein from the framed truth lying in bed at 4pm and still you ain't moved / Damn man.. as each day feels like the same news signs became clear when your staring through a grey view/ I chose drugs over being a good person first just to get stoned drunk or high, whatever got me buzzing worked / Shit, it got so bad it even had me stealing out my mothers purse, without a doubt I'm out without a stuttered word / Losing trust hurts but I was more involved with abusing the drugs curse, now love is lost and thats what sucks worse/ Im an anti socialist hanging out in crowds where no one notices, there's no approaching when you look in these eyes you see the misery and hopelessness / Ghost becomes the host to this emotion switch that my inner soul was opened with a falsified fantasy and I cant get a hold of it / So he contemplates a lot of ways to cope with it, as agony is taking over so he walks the streets at night practically faking sober /
A faded soldier other half anxious boaster on a makeshift coaster thats suppose ta' guide him like a fake kid poser/
He's been beneath and up above when the drugs start seeping in ya blood say hello to the stain, now is it really love or a mellow lethargic pain/ Often times love is just a start to the frame cause most the time its lust you have when your dispersing what you made/ My head feels like how the city lights glow cause in my mind the visions are bright so the pity might grow when the system crisis is shown / Its stress, the anxiety got me living life slow and my mind only helps society see my stereotype grow, so thats why I carry the mic flow that helped me stay away from the burial site... Whoa / Stuck in contemplation looking for the brake pedal, the hunt for drugs was the only way like I just had to raise my face level / Crimes get committed when your chasing after devils from crack rocks and pebbles back lots for rebels were bad spots to settle / Feeling lost and hopeless and my own family was to blind to notice which makes no sense cause they've always been the closest / Chemical imbalance makes it hard to focus feeling lost and hopeless as insanity approaches felt like I've been abandoned by my coaches / Thats when my thoughts tend to scatter and it only makes me madder and keep reaching out in attempts of getting served like a platter / Its fucked and I'm mixed up like batter when problems go beyond the top of the ladder and you act like it doesn't matter the stress comes after / Depressed theres no laughter its a disaster and i need help but these drugs are now my master that own me in every single factor /but prison made me realize that Never will I give up and die I wanna live my life instead of sitting here.. living.. a lie/ Its weird how I'm giving people advice yet its all based around how I've lost control of my own life, this is the anthem for a low life / But as long as it gives my soul light then I guess its not bad but compared to death it all seems so bright/ But really yo... you might think you feel me bro but what you don't see is the pain inside that I'm concealing bro /
The truth is the highest power and yet the most common thing people tend to be alluding. Addiction isn't a mental, its a stencil you made so you don't question what your losing. Specially in America, considering were the land of guns and boozing, drug abusing, thugs and prostitution. I know that modern society can make everything more confusing but your social status is not whats moving, its your soul status thats more prudent so make the most of every and or any action or else its not worth doing. Now wait.. wait.. wait.. I know some of you wont agree but give me a moment to prove it. Regrets are just the times you neglect cause you did something stupid its not worth letting the past be what your present moments should be consuming. When it seems to me like your emotions are getting the best you and that reality is just eluding, you are your own master so why let a tragedy make you lose it. Naturally this galaxy is what made you a student and its all from a base like gravity where you'll come to a solution that could potentially draw your own conclusions
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