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Best Poems Written by Leanne Tuftytift

Below are the all-time best Leanne Tuftytift poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Day In the Life of Poor Leanne

Lovely feathers floating around Leanne
Poor leanne
All she has to cover her is a pan
She wants to find a man 
Who has a fake tan 
She can run very fast
Eventhough she has all of her legs in a cast
In races she used to come last
Oh how time has past
Poor Leanne 
Today leanne went very red
Now she has to hide in the shed
To hide her red head
Or hide in bed
With Ted
Poor Leanne 
Oh golly
She is such a willy wally
She shouldn't let Dan go for Ollie 
Poor leanne 
Somebody giver her a fan 
or at least a man

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Nevem Vanesso

Vanesso a legjobbo
És megeszi az összes pesto
Most azt mondta: "menjünk"
Annak ellenére, hogy úgy érezte, olyan alacsony
Így evett néhány pesto
Így o lett az legjobbo
Valamennyi a resto

Vanesso is the besto
And eats all of the pesto
Now she said "lets go"
Eventhough she felt so low 
So she ate some more pesto
So she became the besto
Of all of the resto

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Lean On Me

Leanne loves milking her cows 
Everyday she dreams of those cows when she is away
A noise she hears
Nay says the horse, Nay says the cows
Nay says Linda, Nay says James
Everyday she hears voices

LEANne on me.....

Please bare a moment to pray and have thought for the dairy farmers in the world :-(

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Tufty Tifty's, Tough Day On the Farm

Leanne was a farm girl at heart
She loved playing with her special cow
She used to eat her mums freshly made tart
Leanne didn't like her brothers sow

Oliver used to make the oil 
Dan made the juice
Oliver used to oil up Leanne and the cows
Dan bit off her ear!

Leanne danced with the poodle
Leanne danced with the cock(erel) 
Leanne's legs where like noodles
Leanne's ear went like a rock

I miss 'Bao to my bab' but Trish won't allow it 
I'm scarred James will leave me
But Linda is by my side
I love Poetry soups!!!!!

----Dedicated to Linda  (Poetry Destroyer A), and JB, you know who you're ;-) ---

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Fracking Farms

Frack off!
Radon in my water, killing me
Arsenic in by veins, making me cough
Cuardilla, ruining my tea
Killing the cows
In Fylde I protest
No fracking here!
Go away




I want to dedicate this to all those farms affected by the fracking crisis! 
I hope your water will be drinkable soon xxxx

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

The European Queen Victoria

I am the queen of geography
I deserve a trophy 
I am the best
better than the rest
this is why I am the queen

In Turkey I swim I skinny dip in the lake
eating some cake
because I am the queen 
during my rule ,
I want to grow a forest of baobabs 
for Leanne's dads 

they call me vanesso 
cause I am the besto 
and I like pesto 
sound 
later peace out xoxoxoxoxox






*******Dedicated to JB and Lindaaaaa******

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Anaconda Take 2

My cow farm don't...
my cow farm don't ...
my farm don't want none unless you got cows hun

Cow named Daisy used to live in kettrin
Big milkin udders , she was givin some mylk
was shoutout with the dairy , but she lived in a barn
Brought be yeo Valley, keeping me jealous
now that's moo moo moo
Gun in my udders, bitch I came dress to moo
who wanna mylk first? I had em pushing daffodils
im high on grass, I only ate half the field
I pooed some dumb shit

by the way what he moo?
he aint missing no milking
come thorugh to my tractor
moo m m moo moo m m moo mooooooooo

My cow farm don't...
my cow farm don't ...
my farm don't want none unless you got cows hun

This dude named vanesso used to ride combinharvestors
moo m m moo moo m m moo mooooooooo

oh my moo look at her udders
oh my moo look at her udders
oh my moo look at her udders
look at her udders (look at her udders)

My cow farm don't...
my cow farm don't ...
my farm don't want none unless you got cows hun

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Leannes Powers

Leanne sniffed a sunflower 
A bee stung her on her nose
It gave her a special power
Her arm turned into a hose 
She gave everyone a shower
Now, at home a river flows 
It could fill a water tower 
And clean old men's dirty toes  
Leanne became a hero 
Gave water to café Nero 
And she even charged zero 
Leanne's power went away 
So then all she did was lay 
Taking up the whole of the day

Details | Leanne Tuftytift Poem

Let Leanne Enleanneten You

Leanne was born on a farm
But only had one arm 
She was a very special gift 
That is why she is called TuftyTift

Because she has such a special gift
It allowed her to see through the mist 
She had a calling from above
On one cold dark morning 

She was told she was born to be an exotic dancer
all because her favourite reindeer is Prancer 
She followed her ambition 
and won the competition  
 
Let Leanne EnLEANNEten you 






****Dedicated to James Bagley****