Rats On Gas

Poet's Notes

(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Terry Flood.

Apparently, rats and mice have a biological quirk as illustrated below. I've been trying my own own recipe consisting of chocolate powder, baking powder, sugar and flour...

RATS LOVE IT...

AND THEY DONT GO BANG!

__________________________

My garden backs onto a farm Which shouldn’t cause any alarm With so much fresh air I’m glad I live there And only one thing spoils its charm I feed the birds and feral cats At night I enjoy watching bats The field mice and spiders That reside beside us Are fine, but there’s too many rats It’s fine that they eat the bird’s seed I watch out for places they’ve peed But there’s a lot more Than there were before The thing that they do best is breed To stop them I have made a start Regrettably, traps play their part I’ve tried every type And none match the hype But guess what… rats can’t burp or fart Although that sounds rather uncouth I read it: It must be the truth I’ll use baking powder To make gassy chowder And those rats are gonna go ‘POOF!’ But these rats are terribly bright They come in the depth of the night I mixed chocolate spread With soda as said The scent would prevail in low light It was late so I went to my bed Those rats were stuck firm in my head Would they be beaten Will that bait be eaten By some other creature instead At first light next morning I checked I didn’t know what to expect The bait was all gone Those rats got it wrong So they should be totally wrecked Could my yard, at last, be rat free A hedgehog is all that I see His innards let rip He shook at the hip And farted and burped ‘Do-Re-Mi’

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Jan Allison

Date: 5/6/2024 12:58:00 PM

oh my goodness this is hilarious Terry! I'd read many years ago the someone fed seagulls baking powder sandwiches' and they exploded but I think its an urban myth cos there are still plenty that crap on my car! hugs Jan xx

Terry Flood
Date: 5/6/2024 1:51:00 PM

Apart from the ‘musical’ hedgehog, this is all true and happening right now. Cleverest rats I’ve ever encountered. I can’t figure out why, but one day they eat every last scrap of my bait, yet the next day, they push it aside or ignore it all together. I’m thinking I might need some hand grenades!

Tom Cunningham

Date: 5/5/2024 10:49:00 PM

Lol, you're on a roll Terry, I think the only way to deal with Roland is a shotgun. Hope you're keeping well. Tom

Terry Flood
Date: 5/6/2024 1:55:00 PM

I am well, thanks, Tom… alas I’m going rapidly bonkers with those scurrying little critters - though some are immense. A shotgun sounds like a good idea but I fear for my conservatory ;-)

Sara Etgen-Baker

Date: 5/5/2024 5:20:00 PM

I loved this string of Limericks...you have such creativity and originality...the connections you make are truly fascinating. A fun read...thank you! enjoy your evening, Sara

Terry Flood
Date: 5/6/2024 1:57:00 PM

Thanks, Sara… at least those pesky critters gave me something to write about in this otherwise lean spell. Glad you enjoyed. Terry