CURTAINS

CURTAINS Setting: A couple in their bedroom. Characters: Wife: Innocent and simpering. Dressed to kill. Husband: Severe. Soberly dressed. Dialogue: Husband: What is that you are wearing my dear? It looks like your mother’s curtains I fear. Wife: The boutique was closed; a bit of a bind. So I had make do with what I could find. Husband: I suppose that’s what’s known as window dressing. Wife: Oh Darling, I find that pun quite depressing. Husband: Far more depressing for your dear Mama, When she finds out where her curtains are. Wife: Do you like the net curtains I’ve used as a veil? Husband: Well … you might have removed the curtain rail. I foresee a problem you’ve not catered for. With that in you’ll never get through the door. Wife: Oh yes. An oversight of mine That calls for a little re-design. Husband: That’s all very well, but I’m still quite appalled And insist the curtains are re-installed. Wife: I thought you would fancy me in these. (Seductively) You can open the curtains whenever you please. Husband: I walked past your mother’s bedroom tonight And saw her undressed; a ghastly sight. Wife: Oh … I see what you mean. That’s quite obscene Husband: If you didn't remove the track, I think you'd better put them back Epilogue An open and shut case