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John Cabascango Poem
It’s been a few months now
Since you don’t greet me at the door
Sleep on the couch next to me
Still find your hairs in the couch
Your crate is still in the laundry room
Empty
It’s quiet now
We all said goodbye
I drove to Richmond to bring one of your boys home
We dug a hole in the backyard
Said a prayer together
I asked, “When you make the world right will you give me back my dog?”
Then we put you in a box
In your new bed
favorite toy
And favorite blanket
Sherri wrote you a sealed letter
“From Mommy”
We all feel your unwritten absence
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2023
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John Cabascango Poem
A Child at Tornillo
Telling my story makes it real
Brings it into existence
What I thought I knew
What I know now
Wasn’t real
No matter how
Well intentioned
Well thought out
How much more a child
Silenced by something real
Something dark
So dark that
Reality is eclipsed
But what if hope
Like light
Can't be extinguished
What if imagination
Expression
Incarnates home, self
A knowledge that creeps through
The surface
What I want isn’t a dream
Not a vision of what isn’t
But what I’ve seen
In my mind’s eye
My heart’s memory
What I hear isn’t invention
A tune I know
Projected in another setting
In a voice too small
To be heard
To be ignored
What if the faith of a child
Is a light that darkness
Cannot comprehend
Cannot overcome
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2023
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John Cabascango Poem
It’d be different if I had no regrets
But I’m too old for that
It’d be different if I had never hedged a bet
But I know that too
It’d be different if I could really say I made a difference
But I can’t really say
It’d be different if I had been the one not to conform
But the truth gets in the way
We celebrate the heroes
We cheer even harder when the villains die
But after the accolades, and verbal grenades
We go back to work
We drink the wine
Eat the bread
There’s only so much time for cheering the fallen
Or Mocking the dead
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2023
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John Cabascango Poem
A Villanelle on Fate
Why do I weep at acts of fate
And gnash, and claw and cry
She weeps not for me, nor can relate
Though I ache and long to consummate
She feels no need to amplify
Why do I weep for acts of fate
There are those who seek to animate
The coldness she would fortify
She weeps not for me, nor can relate
Wildy I seek to dominate
My will dries up and is left dry
Why do I weep at acts of fate
At death do I seek to elevate
Although she sees no need to qualify
She weeps not for me, nor can relate
And though I thought myself a fair candidate
To prophesy, purify, even horrify
Why do I weep at acts of fate
She weeps not for me, nor can relate
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2022
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John Cabascango Poem
The Not Quite Sonnet of Not Quite Success
Play by the rules, or at least the principles
Then you’ll make a difference
Shake off the praise with diffidence
And yet it ends of ostensible
Maybe those with more organization
And less knowledge and skills
Can rise to a pay grade that pays many more bills
And idealization and realization reach a point of conflation
And a drink on a Friday night
And a few extra curves
Bring a loss of position and a few extra nerves
And a bitterness that brings doubt to hindsight
The cycle begins and it ends
With the means and the ends
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2022
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John Cabascango Poem
When I open my mouth
Bats emerge
or worse, or better
What more can be said
How much more to know
To share, to oversimplify
Borders, places
That feel familiar, but not
My story
My language, my beliefs
But not my place
The stories that
Illustrate
Castigate
And just wander
In normal conversations
Ordinary paradoxes
Of those who are
Asking for help
Looking for
Dignity
Place
Something ordinary
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2023
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John Cabascango Poem
Profetica
There are wheels within wheels
And you said that you loved me
There was satin and heels
There are eyes within eyes
And I thought that I knew you
But it’s still a surprise
But the promise to never leave
Is a block of ice that does stay
And won’t go though never will cleave
The Eagle, The Lion, The Ox
We soared, were strong and now labor
It was open, now bound in a tight little box
No more ecstasy and visions
Just love and derision
And anger and hope and decisions
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2022
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John Cabascango Poem
I expected it with you, because you were suffering
I didn’t want it but it seemed a mercy
Of sorts
But now, when she wants to join you, to stop
The suffering, the confusion,the helplessness
The separation from you, two sons, and her God
Everything you all told me seems true
Just harder, lonelier, and now
I’m the adult, the father, the husband
The weddings you’ll miss, the growing old
Not knowing your grandsons
But what is good with and without you
Is because of you, the love you gave
There is a husband, a son, and more of us
In you, with you and waiting
A son lost on Christmas, six without you now
and a wife trapped in a mind betraying her before
Death, eternity, a slow wait
You taught me not to quit, to struggle with doubt
You never gave an easy way out
Hard on the child, kind to the man
I don’t want you back, I will miss mom
But I want her with you, and my brothers
Make a place ready, but don’t rush I’ll be awhile
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2022
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John Cabascango Poem
Captain America’s Shield
Who never would yield
Who could do this all day
And yet
Who’s that good?
Does it always circle around to freedom and courage?
Is it always concentric circles of bravery all the way to the core”
There’s got to be more, some dark chocolate underneath that candy shell
Of patriotism, self-sacrifice, perfect hair?
The shield has no name, it matches the flag, but lots has happened since
Things have heated and cooled several times while it, and you were on ice
Must you always play strong and nice?
Don’t get me wrong, there are enough tortured heroes, so you should do you
And The shield should stay true, but maybe
From time to time
There could be a few dents
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2022
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John Cabascango Poem
My Grandmother’s kitchen
was different than my Abuela’s
Grandma had snacks, watermelon
Abuelita had meals made from
horas en la cocina
and never leaving it
Abuela ordered pollo
from la esquina
Grandma had mints and gum in her purse
Both were enamored with me
which I never earned
I guess that’s what unconditional means
But it’s also a baron, a boy thing
Abuela’s voice on the phone
Está hablando Juanito
Grandma parking into the handicapped sign at Red Lobster
I forgot to hang up my handicap tag
I think they figured it out, Grandma
Copyright © John Cabascango | Year Posted 2023
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